How was I supposed to tell her that after knowing what it felt like to wanther, I didn’t know how to love another woman?That the thought of choosing anyone else felt wrong in a way I couldn’t explain? Gods, I realized with sick clarity that I didn’t even care if Loma was hurt by this. I didn't know her. I didn't have any desire to.
Elowyn’s muffled sobs punched the air from my lungs. I deserved to feel like this. So I stayed where I was and listened to her cry until she fell silent, because moving, because seeking comfort, felt like another crime.
I didn’t deserve peace. Not until I found a way to fix what I’d broken.
Fuck, my body ached as my eyes fluttered open. Confusion hit me hard as I woke up on the floor in front of our bedroom. Then the memories from last night came crashing back. I sat up, looking over my shoulder at the still-closed door. Pressing my ear against it, I listened for any movement inside.
Silence.
She had to be sleeping.
I pushed to my feet and moved through the quiet house, each step too loud in the stillness. I set a kettle on the stove and tried to make us a pot of tea, something warm, something steady, something normal, but my hands wouldn’t stop trembling.
The silence pressed in.
My throat tightened as I tried to rehearse the words I needed to say to her, but every sentence crumbled before it reached my lips. I kept glancing toward the bedroom door. Once. Twice.Every few seconds. Each look weighing heavier. Each heartbeat landing harder.
Something was wrong.
I could feel it, like something was missing in our home.
The sinking feeling in my gut finally swallowed me whole. I abandoned the tea, crossed the room in three strides, and shoved the bedroom door open.
Empty.
Damn it.
I walked in and knew immediately.
Her clothes were gone. Every last thing that belonged to her.
I glanced at the tiny window, my mind scrambling for explanations. Maybe she’d stepped over me while I slept in the hallway. Maybe I hadn’t felt it.
Then the memory hit me like a punch. The fucking amulet. Running my hand through my hair, panic coursed through me as I tried to figure out where she would go. The coven. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw her ring sitting on the nightstand.
My heart stuttered painfully. I picked it up and slid it onto my pinky, the weight of it settling somewhere deep in my chest.
She didn’t get to leave without a word. My chest ached as I used my star mist to transport to the coven. I pounded on the front door until the weird dead guy answered, and I didn’t bother waiting for an invitation before storming inside to where the women stood in the living space.
My eyes scanned their faces, searching for El.
A blonde woman stepped forward. “Can we help you?”
“Yes.” My voice was already tight. “I was supposed to be here yesterday for Elowyn’s crowning. I missed it. I’m here to fix it, and I need to speak with my wife. Where is she?”
Her eyes widened. She glanced at the others, color draining from her face. My patience snapped.
“Your wife,” she finally stammered. “Elowyn isn’t here.”
“Did she come by?”
“Yes.” She stared at me. “You’re her husband?”
“Yes,” I snapped. “Why?”
A short brunette stepped forward. “She came this morning to relinquish her right to the coven as queen. Although…” She hesitated. “She lost the title last night when she never returned with you.”
“No.”
