5
That Friday night, Ben took Suzie’s elbow as they were escorted to their table at Borelli’s. The waiter helped Suzie into her seat, placing a white linen napkin across her lap. Ben sat opposite, suddenly tongue-tied. Luckily, conversation wasn’t necessary as the waiter handed them menus and then proceeded to fill their water goblets. The brief delay gave Ben some time to settle his nerves. His heart was beating fast, his throat was dry. He gratefully gulped the iced water.
Suzie glanced around the restaurant, excitement written on her face. Ben squirmed with guilt. He felt bad being here under false pretences.No, not false pretences.He really wanted to give this a go, andallrelationships started with an initial date, didn’t they? A date didn’t mean it was necessarily going to work out, but who knew what could happen? Ben reminded himself that he really liked Suzie, enjoyed her company—when she wasn’t trying to throw herself at him—and that their friendship was going through a natural progression. Lots of couples started out as friends. He pasted on his best I’m-so-excited-to-go-on-a-date face.
They both started with the potato and leek soup, and he had a steak while Suzie chose a chicken pasta dish. Suzie declined the wine, something that surprised Ben, given she was the one who’d wanted the fine-dining experience, so he had a single glass, not really knowing what he was ordering but taking the waiter’s suggestion of a local Hunter Valley shiraz. The steak was amazing—juicy and tender, and Ben found his nerves were dissipating, allowing him to enjoy the meal. Over the main course, they relaxed into easy conversation, reminiscing about the days before Suzie had broken up with Paul, the guy she had been seeing up until recently.
“I realised that Paul wasn’t the guy for me. In the long run, we wanted different things. He wanted to travel the world and spend time focused on his career, but I’m ready to start settling down. I mean, I’ve never really wanted to travel, I’m happy staying here in Newcastle, and a job is just a job.”
“But I thought you loved your job?” Ben said.
“I do. Sort of. The firm is great, and everyone there is wonderful, but it’s just a job. I do what I need to do, and then I go home. I don’t want to climb the corporate ladder or move on to the next supposedly bigger and better thing.”
“So what do you want?” Ben studied her over his wine glass as she paused and appeared to give his question careful consideration.
“You’re going to think it’s stupid.” She stopped and looked at him carefully before clearing her throat and starting again. “I just want a home and a family. I don’t want much, just someone who loves me and is happy to come home to me each night. I want the house and the kids and the picket fence, the whole shebang.”
As she spoke, images of his own dream life filled his mind. The life he wasn’t destined to experience.
Suzie looked at him from under her lashes, her gaze unsure. “I suppose you think that’s so unambitious and old-fashioned?”
Ben took in her serious expression and considered his words. “No. No, I don’t. I know exactly what you mean. I want the same thing. Somewhere to call my own, a place where I don’t need to worry about anyone else except those I love and coming back from work to a safe and happy home.”
He couldn’t help but think of Spence and how reassured he always felt when he was there to help Ben forget his troubles—Spence, his safe place.
His reverie was broken when Suzie reached across the table and placed her hand over his. He looked up as she gave him a gentle smile. There was a strange kinship as he realised she was just like him—simply looking for love.
* * *
It had beena rough few days.More like a rough week.Ben needed to talk to Spence. Fuck, he hadn’t even told him about the situation with his dad, and he felt guilty because he and Spence usually spoke about everything. Spence had been away on a business trip down to Sydney and then the stuff with Suzie had consumed Ben’s time and thought process, but that wasn’t much of an excuse. He ran a hand through his still-damp hair and took a deep breath.
Ben’s gaze darted to the door as his phone sounded from the bedroom.Aha, Spence’s ears must have been burning.He had no doubt who was calling. There was a definite spring in his step as he rushed from the bathroom, towel hastily wrapped around his hips, and lunged for the ringing phone. With a smile, he put the phone to his ear.
“Hey. What’s up?”
“Ben? Is that you, darling?”
He bit back a sense of disappointment and forced some joviality into his voice. “Who else do you think it would be, Mum? I’m the only one who lives here remember?”
She laughed, a happy tinkling sound over the phone line, a sound he didn’t hear nearly often enough. Itwasgood to hear from her.
Since the incident, his dad hadn’t returned to the house and was staying with his brother, Ben’s uncle Paul. There were legalities to be worked out—charges and protection orders, all the legal options designed to punish his father and protect his mum and Maddy. Ben wasn’t entirely sure what course of action his mother had decided to take or if any decisions had even been made yet. He sat down on the edge of the bed and prepared to have a long chat with his mum. “How are you doing, Mum?”
“I’m fine, darling. Maddy and I have had a pleasant week, all things considered. I decided that we need to freshen up the place a bit, and we’re starting with Maddy’s room. My goodness, you should see your sister and the state she’s in. She’s so excited! There are magazines everywhere and little squares of paper she’s cut out as inspiration. Photos of decorating ideas, fabric samples, and colour swatches. You’re lucky you aren’t here.” She laughed again. Obviously, she was enjoying Maddy’s “mess” as much as Maddy was. “I was just calling to see how you are, since you cancelled on us last night. Did you have a nice dinner?”
For a moment, Ben wished he hadn’t mentioned the dinner date with Suzie when he’d called his mum to let her know he wouldn’t be popping around. She hadn’t been the least bit upset, not when she’d found out the reason for his no-show. She hadn’t pushed for information either; he guessed because it was such a rare occurrence, she didn’t want to tempt fate before the date actually happened. But there’d be no stopping her now, and she’d be itching for details.
He straightened and took a deep breath. By the time he’d finished giving her an overview of his evening with Suzie, he felt like he’d run a marathon, but at least it was out there—he’d been on a date with someone who’d make his mum happy, and importantly, given her something positive—for her at least—to focus on.
“Oh, that’s wonderful, darling. I’m so glad you had a nice time. I’ve always liked Suzie; you’ll have to bring her around for dinner soon. That is… you are planning on seeing her again, aren’t you?”
He hesitated briefly before replying in the affirmative. Ithadended up being a nice night, even if he didn’t view Suzie as more than a friend. Surely it wouldn’t hurt to see where things went?
“I’m so happy for you, Ben. All I want is for you to find that special someone and settle down. I worry about you being lonely and not getting out there and dating. I’ve been so worried that you wouldn’t meet anyone, between all the work you do and then the time you spend staying at home.”
“You know I like to have early nights because of my early starts—”
“But when you do go out, it’s to hang with your friends, and I was sure you wouldn’t meet anyone new. How fabulous that you connected with someone from your own group. It was right under your nose this whole time.”
