Coach has subbed everyone except for me and Cas. We’re in the third period with the score tied at seven. I’m fucking tired and dripping with sweat, but don’t show it. When the buzzer sounds for the end of the period, we all skate over to the bench. Before I can reach my team, Masen and Kellan cut in front of me. I shoot the bastards a grin and rest my arm on top of my stick.
“We’re taking the win,” Kellan says in a smug tone.
I nod my head and hum, which just pisses them both off. I unclasp my chin strap and take my helmet off, then turn my head to the side and smile. When I turn back to them I find they are looking over at what caught my attention. Both their faces are masks of outrage.
“Win or lose, she’ll still be under me tonight,” I say in a husky tone that has Kellan losing his shit like I knew he would. He charges me. I let him take me to the ice. He lands on top of me, making me grunt. When he cocks his arm back I don’t stop him or even try to defend myself. Both teams are screaming at him as they surge toward us, but it’s too late.
“Fuck you!” he yells as his fist connects with my cheek, making me grunt. I grind my teeth and force myself not to react. Masen yanks him off, just as my team arrives. Cas skates right at me and barrels into Masen. I shove the fuckers off me as I get to my feet. The ref is blowing his whistle making me smile.
“Fucking cunt, I’ll break your fucking jaw,” Cas roars.
“Fuck off, Caspian,” Masen shouts back.
“Get off my ice. You’re out of the game!” the ref bellows at Kellan. The anger drains from his face when he realizes what he just did. He looks up at me in a stupor. I shoot the fucker a wink and tap my cheek with two fingers.
“Worth it,” I say with smug satisfaction that has him snarling at me. Masen pushes Cas away from him as the ref escorts a seething Kellan from the ice. When Masen comes at me, my team draws in, ready to throw the fuck down if he does anything.
“Keep my sister out of this,” he grits out.
I purse my lips and pretend to think over what he is saying. “Nah, I think I’ll keep her around. I like how my name sounds when she screams it.” My team all chuckle as Masen rears back in disgust.
“She can sit there and wear your number, but she will always be a Kellar. Lie to everyone else, but we all know you’re only fucking her to get at me because you can’t stand any of us. Enjoy it while it lasts.” The motherfucker looks me up and down like I’m nothing, which has me gritting my teeth. “At least I still have a sister for you to fuck with.”
I black the fuck out. I see red as I let the monster inside me take full control and relish in the darkness that consumes me as I let him feed on my arch enemy.
CHAPTER FORTY-THREE
TOREN
I was already up and out of my seat when Kellan attacked Xaden. I’m halfway to the Raven’s bench when a scream lodges in my throat at the sight of Xaden attacking my brother. All hell breaks loose when every member of the team jumps into the brawl. Guys who were sitting on the bench leap over the rail onto the ice to back their team in the fight. I dart forward and pound my fist against the glass, screaming for them to stop. It's a frenzy out there. The crowd is split. Half of them are screaming for the idiots to stop fighting and play, while the other half is egging them on and demanding they draw blood.
Both coaches are on the ice, trying to get their teams under control. Even the ref is in amongst the chaos, trying to defuse the situation. Harper slams to a stop beside me, shouting something but I hear nothing over the roaring of my pulse. I watch Xaden and Masen trade blow for blow, both their faces are bloodied and bruised. Cas is facing off against Darren and Kellan, who’s now back on the ice, looking to get in on the action.
When my brother screams in pain, a sob bubbles out of me. Xaden doesn’t stop hitting him. I cry as I watch him beat my brother. Masen isn’t even fighting back now.
“Xaden stop! You’ll kill him,” I scream. He doesn’t hear me. I look around to find the gate open to the ice. Without thinking, I run to it and hit the ice. My feet slip and I windmill my arms to try to balance myself.
“Toren!” Harper screams from behind me as I slide my feet along the ice to get to my brother.
“Get back here now, you fool,” I hear my dad shout but I don’t stop. I flinch when a few players tumble along the ice toward me and pivot out of their way as best as I can. When I see Masen’s head loll to the side, his eyes are closed and I can tell he’s unconscious. Xaden lifts his arm ready to hit him again. I push my legs as fast as they will move along the ice. I lose my footing and land on my knees, the momentum has me sliding across the ice toward them.
I crash into Xaden’s side with a grunt. He snaps his head to the side but looks right through me. He’s surrendered to his rage, it’s wrapped him in his clutches and taken control. He isn’t seeing me right now, all he sees is the enemy. He switches from wanting to punch my brother to wrapping his hand around my throat. I gasp in shock, my eyes widening in fear. Those gray eyes burn with bloodlust. I grip his forearm in my hands and try to pry him off me, but he’s too strong.
“Fucking Kellars,” he screams in my face. I gasp for air and dig my nails into his arm, trying to pry him off me. His rage is clear in those eyes but I also see the torment. I see his loathing, his regret and above all else I see his pain. Cas appears as I begin to see black spots dancing in the corner of my eyes. Arms wrap around me from behind as they try to pull me free, but Xaden doesn’t let go.
“X, you need to stop, man,” Cas snaps at his friend but Xaden doesn’t hear him. All he wants is to make true on his promise, he wants my death. “Xaden, let her fucking go!” Cas roars. I feel sluggish, I’m losing feeling in all my limbs and my vision beginsto swim as I slowly start to fade away into nothing. I release my hold on his arm and close my eyes. I surrender to the gift of nothingness he is offering me. To escape this world of hatred and pain is a prize. I’m not a coward, I’m a realist.
There is nothing for me here.
Just as I feel myself slipping away, the grip on my throat disappears. I slump backward into the person holding me and gasp for air. I cough and splutter as I open my eyes to see Xaden being pulled back by Cas, Brady and two others from his team.
I stare at him through the tears rolling down my cheeks. He’s the definition of evil. He radiates darkness like a super power, he doesn’t hide from it. He embraces the call of death and embodies it like it's his armor. He’s the devil in the flesh, yet I’m a moth to his flame, sucked into his orbit, unable to stay away from the misery and pain he offers me daily. I cling to it because it's what I deserve.
“Toren?” At the sound of my name I turn and look over my shoulder to see it’s Kellan who’s holding me. He rubs his hand up and down my back. Shouts and screams for all the players to get the fuck off the ice sound out around us. “Are you okay?” he asks me. I continue coughing and rubbing my throat. I feel like sandpaper has been dragged through my esophagus, all I can manage is a weak nod.
I look over in time to see two medics drop down beside my brother, then my father appears by him. He shoots me a scornful look before turning to Kellan. “Get her off the ice. The game is canceled thanks to that fucking animal,” he spits. Kellan helps me to my feet but my knees give out. He lifts me in his arms bridal style and looks down at me with a sorrowful look. My dad didn’t appear concerned for my wellbeing or even ask me if I was okay.
A year ago I would have given a kidney to be in his arms like this, but now, it just feels wrong. His chest isn’t firm enough,his arms don’t grip me tight enough, my stomach doesn’t swoop and no heat pulses through me just from him being near. Kellan skates across the ice and carries me through the crowd toward the locker rooms.
