I have no idea where Xaden and Cas went and honestly, I’m glad for the reprieve from their presence. The moment I walked through the door and Harper saw me, she stole a bottle of Hennessy out of the cupboard, then grabbed my hand and led me up to the roof. We’ve been sitting here in silence with her drinking while I keep my pendant clutched in my hand repeating my chant.
To teach is to learn. To learn is to excel. To excel is to thrive. To thrive is to live.
“You still holding onto that thing?” Harper's question pulls me from my inner thoughts. I loll my head to the side and find her gaze on my pendant clutched in my hand.
I release a sigh. “It’s the only thing that keeps me… present.”
Her brows furrow. “What does that mean, Tor?”
I pinch my lips to the side and debate how to explain. “I don’t know. Ever since Emery gave it to me…” I pause when I see her face contort. “What?”
She shakes her head. “Nothing,” she mutters, then takes another swig of the drink.
“No. Tell me what that look meant.”
She releases an exasperated sigh. “I didn’t mean to upset you. I just thought that when you got out of Walter House that you would have left that whole Emery thing behind.”
I bite down on the inside of my cheek to keep from lashing out at her. I know Harp has always been reserved when it came to Emery. Em tried to talk to Harper numerous times, but she would either ignore her or not answer unless I asked the question again. It used to piss me off.
“Should I have left you behind as well?” I blurt.
Hurt shines in her eyes and I wince, I shouldn’t have lashed out at her but I won’t sit here and put my friend down. I miss Em like crazy and wish more than anything she was here with us as well. “I’m sorry,” she mutters as she takes another swig.
I deflate and take a sip of my water that I brought up with me.
“It’s not your fault. I shouldn’t have snapped at you. It’s just… everything has been so fucked up since I got back. Nothing is like how I thought it would be. KennaDee is gone and it’s all my fault.” Tears prick the backs of my eyes and I try to fight them back, but the second Harper scoots closer to me and wraps her arm around my shoulders I lose the battle. “Everyone hates me. The memes and all the social media hate you told me about when we met makes sense now, but I can’t shake the feeling that they are all wrong. I would never have gotten behind the wheel drunk?—”
“Hey, hey, calm down, babe. I believe you.” I pull away and turn to face Harper. She smiles reassuringly and nods her head.
“Why? The people I have known my whole life don’t even believe a word out of my mouth. My brother hates me. Kellan can’t even look at me and Cas is… broken. And the worst part, the only person who actually seems to give a shit about me is the person who hates me the most.”
Her eyes come alive with wonder and I cringe. “The sexy guy from last night?”
I snort out a laugh and nod. “Xaden hates me, why? I have no idea but he seems to be the only person who is on my side, which is stupid because time and time again he has told me he can’t stand me and he even calls meTink!”
Harper frowns. “Tink?” she asks with a raised brow.
“According to him, he calls me that because fairies die when people stop believing in them and one day when the last person who believes in me stops, I’ll die.”
Her eyes widen and her mouth parts in a silent gasp. “That is… um… Fuck, I have no clue what the hell to say to that other than it’s fucking poetic.”
I scoff and roll my eyes as I take another sip of my water. “Not a fan of the name I gave you, Tink?” I spit half the drink out of my mouth, making Harper cry out in surprise and then choke on the other half. Xaden stands there grinning and not offering to help, leaving Harper to pat my back and try and help me stop choking. When I finally get myself under control I glare up at the dark fucking god.
I hate how fucking beautiful he is.
He’s clearly just showered, because his hair is wet and he’s in different clothes from when I saw him earlier. I hate that just the sight of him has my pulse racing and my breath hitching. He’s made it clear I mean nothing to him, he despises me and wants to see me broken. But, why do I feel this inexplicable pull toward him? Xaden Devlin isn’t someone I would forget yet he looks so familiar.
“Are you just gonna stand there eyeing my girl like a snack, or sit your ass down and help us finish this bottle I stole from you?” Harper’s comment has me breaking out into a fit of laughter, the tension inside me eases but I can feel the heat in my cheeks. Harper has never been one to filter what comes out of her mouth and I start to worry the amount of booze she has drunk will make it worse.
“Nah. I’m not looking at her like a snack. I’m looking at a killer who hasn’t learned their fucking lesson.” His words are like a dagger to my gut. Bile rushes up my throat and the water in my stomach begins to sour. I haven’t touched any of the alcohol and yet he thinks so little of me that he would assume I would turn to booze to numb my pain.
Normally I wouldn’t say anything and just walk off or ignore it, but not tonight. I push to my feet and press forward until I’m forced to crane my neck back to hold his gaze. Without uttering a single word I grip the front of his hoodie and pull him down to me. Before he questions my motives, I smash my lips against his and force my tongue inside his mouth, making him taste me. His hands find my waist and pull me flush against him. I could get lost in him, in this kiss but I refuse to. I pull back and harden my features as I meet his stare.
“As you cantaste, I haven’t had a single drop of liquor, you judgmental prick!” I release my hold on him and try to shove him back, but he doesn’t budge an inch. When I attempt to turn and walk away, he wraps an arm around my waist and pulls me back against him. I gasp in surprise, placing my hands instinctively on his chest. He cuts his gaze above my head to look at Harper and says.
“Take a walk.” My friend opens her mouth to no doubt argue but Xaden pushes on. “Fuck with me and Tink here will be the one I punish, not you.” Harper looks at me and I know if I shake my head she will remain where she is and fight, but I don’t want to put her in that position.
“It’s fine, I’ll meet you in my room shortly,” I assure her with a forced smile. Harper doesn’t budge and when Xaden growls I just know I have mere seconds to get rid of her before he loses his shit. “Harp, go inside. I swear I’m okay. Xaden won’t hurt me.” It surprises me how much conviction laces my words. She purses her lips and nods stiffly before making her way backinside the building. Xaden and I don’t move or utter a single word until the door clicks shut behind her.
