While I showered and changed, I ran through possibilities that caused Brandon to lock himself down again. I wasn’t sure if it was the fact that Dr. Perry mentioned that we both earned our psychology degrees together, or if Brandon felt threatened by Dr. Perry because she and I had been friends for decades.
That might be it.
I recalled that Brandon felt threatened by Andrew, Joshua, and Alison all at one time. I would say he felt jealous over my relationships with them, but he was afraid of losing time with me to them. Brandon would push for what he wanted, though. The drive he had to capture my attention excited me. A little extra close time with him tonight would do the trick.
“What shall we make for dinner, pup?” I asked as I walked into the living room.
The living room was empty. I went to the kitchen, hoping that maybe he was motivated to start dinner, but the kitchen was empty too. My pulse began to pick up pace as I glanced at the deck outside when I walked through the living room. I went down the hallway to the spare bathroom but found the light was off.
Initially I thought that maybe he was feeling as though he needed to cut himself and had gone into the bathroom. We’d had many discussions on cutting and when he felt like the need was coming on. My goal was for him to come to me whenever he felt like he needed to cut so we could talk, and together we could prevent him from harming himself.
I flipped the light on in the bathroom to make sure he wasn’t sitting in the dark on the floor. He’d done that before when he would punish himself for certain things. Sometimes he would force himself to sit in the dark and other times he would sit in the shower and let the water hit him in the face. We’d curbed most of the self-punishing acts, but every now and then something affected him unexpectedly; such as this.
After checking all the other rooms, including mine, I hurried out to the living room again. His cell phone was still on the couch, which relieved me and worried me. I didn’t think he’d leave the house without it. But I was also worried that he had left without it.
“Pup?” I called out.
I jogged to the entryway, and when I noticed that the front door was unlocked, I ran outside. Looking up and down our street, I hollered out, “Brandon!”
2
Brandon
James was goingto be just like Eli.
All the way home from Andrew’s, the only thing I could think about was all the similarities between James and Eli. The most obvious, and possibly the most destructive, was that they were both psychologists. Well, James had been at least. Either way, they both knew how to fuck with a head.
I fell for it once and had almost fallen for it again. I wouldn’t be fooled again. Today was Saturday, and James wouldn’t be going to work again until Monday. Come Monday, I would be out of here. I had a load of money sitting in some accounts and could live off of that.
The longer James sat with me on the couch, the more I settled down. If I waited until Monday, I knew that I wouldn’t have the balls to leave. I saw a brief opportunity to leave when James went to take a shower. The second I heard the water turn on in his shower, I ran for the front door. Quietly, I closed it behind me and then took off in a sprint.
Being on foot, I knew I had to be smart and quick. I ran up and down the hills of the elite Malibu neighborhood and out to the busy main street. I needed to think and do it quickly now that I was out of the house. Fifty yards away a bus was letting people off. Thankfully, the traffic light was on my side, and the walk symbol was illuminated. As I ran across the street, I reached for my wallet in my back pocket. Thank God I had my wallet!
I reached the end of the line of people waiting to get on the bus and nonchalantly looked back in the direction that I had just come from. I had thirty years of youth on my side over James. But I wasn’t ruling anything out with him. I opened my wallet and prayed for some cash to be there.
“Yes,” I panted under my breath as I pulled a dollar bill from the leather wallet.
I climbed onto the crowded bus and fed my dollar into the money slot. As I made my way down the aisle, I ran a shaky hand through my hair. I sat on a seat toward the back of the bus and took a deep breath as soon as the bus pulled away from the curb.
For hours I rode around on the bus, trying to think about what I was doing. Though I wasn’t sure of what I was going to do, I was certain that I wasn’t going to fall for another shrink’s games.
It was dark outside now, and I knew that I couldn’t ride the bus around all night. Glancing outside, I was familiar with the area and got off at the next stop. The Ritz-Carlton was close, and I made my way there on foot. I’d never stayed here before, but my mom always spoke enthusiastically about photoshoots there.
I walked past a lot of dark alleys and people arguing in the shadows. Being a kid from Beverly Hills, my mom made sure I had a rather sheltered life. But after my time with Sebastian, nothing scared me.
Well, except James being a shrink.
That scared the fuck out of me.
I ran my hand through my hair to make sure that I looked somewhat presentable and could even get in the door of The Ritz. I walked along the sidewalk that took me past the valet, and a doorman opened the door and nodded at me as I approached.
“Good evening,” he greeted me.
“Hi,” I replied and gave him a nod. My mom hadn’t taught me a lot or spent much time with me, but one thing she taught me when I was very young was to walk like I owned the place.
The lobby of The Ritz-Carlton on a Saturday night was bustling with a social and elite crowd. Small groups gathered throughout the lobby, chatting and laughing. Many of them were dressed up like they were on their way to a party. Though, this was L.A., and getting dressed up like that was just a thing many people did. At least, it was in the circle that my mom kept.
Stretching from the ceiling to the floor of the lobby was a sleek, modern waterfall. As I walked toward the front desk, I stared at the massive waterfall. A few girls who looked to be around my age stood in front of the waterfall, and we exchanged smiles as I walked past. Even though my nerves were shot and I felt mentally drained, I kept my head up and walked like the place was mine.
