“Andrew, your face,” James began. “You’ve always had your face as a hard limit from anything that could cause markings.”
“I know, James,” I agreed and looked down.
James slid forward to the edge of his seat, reached out and tapped a few of his fingers under my chin. I looked up at him.
“Do not look down in shame because of someone else’s error, Andrew. That will put you on a slippery slope.”
“I know.” I nodded and took a deep breath. “It was an accident,” I explained.
James stared at me for a few moments and considered what I was saying.
“I encourage you to be careful with making excuses as well.” James stood and told me that he should have the crop ready in about a week. Before he walked away, he pressed his hand down on my shoulder. “And Andrew, you know where to find me if you need to talk. I am always here for you.”
On my way back to Elise’s, I stopped at the drive-thru of the coffee house that was close to the house. I ordered her a regular house coffee, and just in case her taste buds were up to it, I ordered her original go-to beverage; a peppermint mocha with extra whip. I timed pulling in around the same time I would have if I had gone to work.
When I went inside, I found her sitting at the kitchen table, going through the mail with a glass of wine. Elise looked up when I set the coffee carrier down on the table.
“What’s that?” she asked with an arched eyebrow.
“I thought maybe you’d like some coffee.”
Elise reached for the open bottle of wine that was within reach, and she shook it. Not much sloshed around in the bottle.
“I’ve had plenty to drink right here. But I’ll take the coffee. In case you haven’t noticed, I stopped drinking the peppermint mocha.”
“I noticed. But I thought maybe your taste buds might be craving it if you saw it,” I said lightly and with a smile.
I glanced down at the messy kitchen table. It looked like she hadn’t gone through her mail in over a week. She looked stressed and as though she might have been crying.
“Is everything okay, Mistress Elise?”
“It’s all just great.”
Elise picked up a rectangular card and flicked it across the table at me. I caught it and read it. It looked like it was an invitation to a dinner and auction for the Riverside Fire Departments.
“This looks like a great event,” I said out loud and pulled a chair out.
“What are you doing?” she asked.
What the fuck was I doing?
Being a friend that she clearly didn’t want.
I pushed the chair in and knelt on the floor to her left. I bit down on the inside of my mouth to prevent me from wincing as I sat back on my heels. I could feel the welts and flesh being pulled at.
“I used to always go to the annual dinner and auction with Jacob.”
Elise laughed along as she recalled things they would bid on. It didn’t escape my notice that the more she spoke, the more her speech slurred in places. Now I was glad that I stopped to get her coffee.
As I listened, I could hear the sadness in her tone. She missed Jacob very much, and the invitation to an event the two of them always took part in scraped open the wound of loss.
“In my book, it says that it’s okay—”
Elise reached down and slapped my mouth, causing me to bite the inside of my lip.
“I don’t think I asked you what your goddamned ‘woe is me’ book said.”
When she picked up her invitation card again, I ran my tongue along the inside of my mouth and could taste a bit of blood. Words from James were ringing out clearly.Trust your gut.
