The following week when Liz came in, I hurried to make the drinks for her and Elise and debated about giving her the book. Though I felt it was the right thing to do, I worried that I was overstepping. When Liz came to the receiving counter, I pulled the paperback book out of my back pocket. I set it on the counter and pushed it towards Liz.
“I have had this book for a while, and it helped me with some things. I thought that maybe if you thought it would be okay, you could give it to Elise.” I shrugged as I grabbed a bakery bag. “I thought maybe there would be some things in there that might reach her.” I used the tongs to put the cinnamon chip muffin in the bakery bag and returned to the receiving counter.
“This is very kind of you, Andrew,” Liz commented as she read the back of the paperback.
I stared in embarrassment at the crumpled corners and the crease in the cover. I shouldn’t have given her this copy. I should have bought her a new one.
“Maybe there’s something in there that will help,” I said again.
Liz nodded and said she would give it to her along with the cinnamon chip muffin.
I continued to see Liz each week for the next three weeks. She would fill me in on the progress of Elise, and I would always send her back with the cinnamon chip muffin and a smiley face on the bakery bag.
The next week, I had been pouring hot coffee in a cup when Liz walked in…with Elise. I did a double-take and stopped paying attention to what I was doing and spilled coffee all over the counter. I quickly cleaned it up and finished out the two orders that were already waiting, by the time Liz and Elise had arrived at the counter to order.
I began to make their usual drinks so they’d be ready for them when they got down to the receiving counter. I looked up occasionally to glance at Elise. I noticed how much weight she had lost since I had last seen her. When she removed her sunglasses, I saw the dark circles under her eyes. She looked like she desperately needed sleep.
“Liz and Elise,” I proudly said as they approached. I slid their usual drinks forward with a smile.
“Um,” Liz said as she collected her drink and a straw.
“I didn’t order this,” Elise said flatly without looking up.
Shit!
“Uh, sorry,” I said and sidestepped the receiving counter to look at the screen for her order.Fuck. A cup of house coffee. I slid back to the receiving counter and apologized again for my mistake and told them to have a seat, and I’d bring it out. Liz and Elise sat down by the window and carried on while I fixed my blunder.
That was fucking dumb of me. I shouldn’t have assumed. Assuming is stupid. Of course, she has ordered the same drink for years. But still, it’s not an excuse. I poured the cup of house coffee and took it over to their table.
“Here you are, Elise. One cup of house blend coffee. I’m sorry for the mix-up,” I apologized again.
“It’s fine,” Elise said without looking up.
That was it? Liz gave me a sympathetic look, almost as if she was apologizing for Elise. But it was okay. I fucked up on Elise’s first visit back to the coffee house since the death of her husband. I nodded at Liz and went back to behind the counter.
By the five-month mark after the death of her husband, Elise was starting to look a little healthier. She continued to come in with Liz after what I assumed was their workout. I have learned not to assume anything anymore.
The first place I noticed it was on her face. Her cheekbones weren’t as prominent, and her shoulder bones didn’t poke through her shirt anymore. I also noticed that her face overall no longer looked like a ghost; pale with dark circles under her eyes.
While I could tell that she was trying to get back to her old self and find comfort in a routine, I could also see that some things had changed. After the death of a spouse, one would expect the survivor to go through some changes. Considering how close Elise had been to Jacob, from what Liz had said, the changes were almost expected. I stopped to think about how I might feel if I had lost a partner that deep. If I had lost my master.
Of course, I had to have a master in the first place. Someday I would have one that would meet my needs.
Six months after the death of Jacob, Elise no longer wore her wedding ring. She had stopped painting her nails any color but a deep red, or maroon, or burgundy. Her body had become more toned than I had seen it before. Definition around her biceps had taken slight shape, and there was a clear line leading from her elbows down to her wrists.
Around the seventh month mark, I barely recognized the woman that came in alongside Liz. In fact, when she came in with Liz on a busy Friday morning, I had to do a double-take. The blonde woman I was used to seeing, was now a brunette with some red highlights. As they stood in line and talked, I noticed how the sunlight that came in from the windows made her hair glow a beautiful auburn.
The beautiful stranger with the auburn hair collected her large cup of house blend coffee and dropped a few dollars into my tip jar before she headed to the door with Liz. I watched her ass in those yoga pants that accentuated every curve as she moved. My cock straining in my pants reminded me that I had a thing for women with auburn hair.
2
Elise
I satacross from Liz and listened to her tell me for the millionth time that going back to the club might help. The other times that she had mentioned it, I tuned most of it out. I wasn’t ready and was overcome with guilt for even thinking about it.
“Elise, you can’t forget that you’re alive,” Liz reminded me as I sipped on my coffee.
“I know, Liz.” I shook my head and set the coffee cup down. “I think about it sometimes and can’t even imagine submitting to another man,” I admitted. “Or woman,” I added.
