“Don’t ever touch my fucking stuff again,” Iwarned.
“Orwhat?”
“You might find a camcorder inpieces.”
“This camcorder helps to pay the bills around here, pussy. You lay your hands on my camcorder, and you might not be alert to feel me tearing youup.”
“Why don’t we just stay the fuck away from one another?” Ioffered.
“Can’t, little pussy.” He gave me a smug look. “Dad said that I need to take care ofyou.”
“I don’t need anyone to take care of me!” Iyelled.
I fought back the tears despite feeling the lump in mythroat.
“You do. Little. Baby. Pussy. Brother.” The way he accentuated each word made my skincrawl.
“Fuck you! Don’t call me that. Any of it. We’re notbrothers.”
His laughter quickly changed to moaning. I slowly continued my path to thedoor.
“Wait! Do you want me to help you with thetape?”
“Fuck you! I’mfine.”
“I didn’t hear you cry when you pulled it off, so I know you’re still wearingit.”
“Fuckyou.”
“Gonna have one of your gay teammates help you in the lockerroom?”
I kept walking and felt the tape with eachstride.
“Mom thought the tape would befunny.”
I don’t know why I stopped walking, but I did. I turned to look at my brother squirming on thechair.
“Mom? Mom did thetape?”
“Yep.”
I don’t know why that stung as much as it had. I made my way to the bus stop and was almost totally out of breath by the time I got to the bench. There were a handful of people waiting already so I knew the bus would be there anyminute.
While I waited, I retraced my morning. I had everything I needed for the game and after. What happened after the game was still undecided. I refrained from grabbing my crotch when I stood to get in line to get on thebus.
I prayed for a seat to rest on. I didn’t think I’d be able to stand and hold the handrail. Everyone shuffled on slowly, and I glanced around them for a seat. Fuck yeah! There were lots of empty seats. I asked a guy next to me for thetime.
“8:30, kid,” he said and showed me hiswatch.
I nodded and then he gestured to my bat bag and pointed to the “USC Trojans” screen print on mysweatshirt.
“Youplay?”
“Yes, I’m the thirdbaseman.”
“Wow, that’s really great. You guys have a good schedule this month. The city has high hopes for our boys in crimson andgold.”
I chatted with the guy about baseball for the entire ride. He turned out to be a good distraction. It was 9:15 when I got off the bus and slowly took a deeper breath. It hurt like hell. Our game wasn’t until 7:00 tonight, so I had time to do some repair andpractice.
