She continued to mumble and talk to herself. It was as though I didn’texist.
“Mom,” I triedagain.
“Fuck, Ryan!” sheyelled.
She reached out and started to slap my face and head until I moved away. I wiped my face to see if I was bleedinganywhere.
“Jesus, Mom. What thefuck?”
“I’m trying to make ends meet,Ryan!”
She began to cry and held her head in herhands.
“It’s been so hard without yourfather.”
I stared at the ceiling. I couldn’t listen tothis.
“Ryan,baby—”
“Stop it! Stop calling mebaby!”
“Baby, it’s always what I’ve calledyou.”
“I hate it!” I yelled and covered my ears so I wouldn’t have to hear itagain.
“Calm down, baby. You just need someattention.”
I backed away from her; we weren’t doing thisanymore.
“No, Idon’t.”
“I can call some of my friends, and they can come over. We can help each other out, baby. They can give you a good time, and I can earn somemoney.”
She walked toward the phone. She was out of hermind.
“Mom! They aren’t your friends! Who are you kidding? Few of them are the same people. From week to week, they’re all different. They’re strangers that you’re bringing into our home. If you think they’re friends, you’re dead fuckingwrong.”
She set the phone down and stalked over to me and slapped me across theface.
“How dare you say that to me, Chad. They’re very goodfriends.”
Here we go with the temporary name confusion game. It’d been happening more often lately. Since my dad had been gone, it’d been gettingworse.
“They’re not your friends, Mom. Do you know any of their names?” Iasked.
“Of course, I do!” She looked away and then back at me. I knew she didn’t know any of theirnames.
“Who are they? Tell me, since they’re such good friends ofyours.”
My mom got frustrated and began pounding on mychest.
“I don’t have to explain a goddamn fucking thing to you! I don’t have to tell you who my friendsare!”
“They’re not friends. No one in their right mind would pay you for what you’ve been selling out of this house. I’ve allowed this for way too long. No fucking more! I’mleaving!”
“Oh, baby, you don’t meanthat.”
“I have a place. I’m leavingSunday.”
