“So going to Pine Creek Falls really was a necessity,” Ginny says. She’s got a weird look on her face that I can’t quite read. It’s forlorn but has a bit of acceptance too. It must be because we’re video chatting. I can always understand my sister’s silent communications, but the computer screen must be messing with that.
“I think it was. I’m still learning my way around town. This place feels like home, but different at the same time.”
“Then you should definitely stay for as long as you need to.” She nods, a smile back on her face.
“I want to know more about Holt.” Addie grins.
I groan. “There’s nothing more to tell.”
“Which means there’s a whole lot of things she wants to say but isn’t,” Lottie says dryly.
“You like him,” Ginny states plainly.
“I can’t like him,” I whine.
“Why not?”
“For like a million reasons, Gin.” I tick them off my fingers. “He’s a widower and still very in lovewith his wife. He’s a single dad. His life is here in this town. None of those things make for an easy relationship when I live across the country and don’t actually know how to have one.”
Lottie whistles. “Did y’all hear what she just said?”
“Sure did,” Addie teases.
“No way you could miss that one.”
Ginny’s amusement makes me lash out. “What are you guys talking about?”
“You said the R-word,” Lottie says with a smug grin.
“The R-word?”
Addie curls her hands around her mouth to whisper, “Relationship.”
“You guys are idiots.” The three of them crack up at my annoyance. “I’m going to hang up on you.”
“You will not,” my sister says through her laughter. “You need our help to work this out too much.”
She’s frustratingly right.
Lottie starts. “So. The issue at hand is that you like this guy. He seems to tick all of the boxes you like in a man, except for the fact that he lives in a town you’re only temporarily residing in, right?”
“And he’s a single dad. I don’t know what to do with kids. I’m not a kid person.”
“Bullshit,” Ginny says with gusto. “You just don’t like the idea of pregnancy or having kids of your own.”
I throw my hands in the air. “How is that different?”
“Because they’re his kids. You could love them and take care of them, but you will never be their mom. They already have one, she’s just not there anymore.”
Ginny’s words stop my heart. It kills me to think about those girls losing their mom at such a young age. She’s also right. I wouldn’t ever want to try to replace the mother they lost. “How do I compete with a ghost? By all accounts, Holt’s wife was a saint. I can’t live up to that standard.”
“You could,” Lottie says softly. “But you don’t have to. If you want to do this, truly dive headfirst into a relationship like this, you can’t think it’s a competition.”
Addie jumps in. “It’s more like you’re walking next to her. She’ll always be a part of their life, and you have to decide if you can love them alongside her.”
I shake my head. “This has gone way beyond the scope of the issue. I’m not dating this guy, let alone in a relationship with him. He hasn’t even indicated that’s something he wants.” Oh, I’m sure Holt would love to fuck me again. I’ve seen that in his eyes, but dating is a whole other thing. I’m not the kind of woman men look for as a girlfriend. I’m too opinionated and have too many sharp edges to keep them around. Holt would be no different.
Lottie looks at me like I’m stupid. “Honey, he’s letting you stay in his house with his kids when he barely knows you. He wants more than a one-night stand.”
