“How long were you in here?” I scream. “How long were you watching me sleep?”
“I wasn’t watching you sleep—”
“How long?!”
“I don’t know,” he admits, shaking his head. “I’ve… not been feeling well, and—”
“Andwhat?” I pull the blankets up higher, feeling vulnerable and exposed.
I’m naked and covered in cum.
Sam’s eyes narrow, looking at me like I’m an alien, like he’s trying to figure something out. Then something flashes in his eyes, like he’s understanding something, or just putting something together.
“Sailor, this isn’t working out,” he says.
“Yeah, no shit, Sam. You’re watching me sleep.”
He flinches, having the audacity to be offended even though he’s freaking me out. With a sigh, he says, “I have to get ready for work.”
He leaves the room, his feet dragging along the hardwood floor. A moment later, the bathroom door shuts, and I’m more creeped out than I’ve ever been before.
Returning home isn’t as happy as I expected it to be. It’s not that I’m scared, I think a lot of that fear went away with Jaxon straight up ignoring me over the last couple of months, but I do feel empty. Lonely. Sad. Disappointed.
As stressful as being with Sam was, it was nice not being alone all the time. It was nice knowing there was someone in the other room… in case I needed him.
The front door swings against the wall gently, and I drop my bags before going to the car to get the rest. Once the door is locked and closed, all my things piled to the side, I take in my house.
It looks exactly the way I left it, only it smells a little… stale. The weather is cold, and it’s rainy, but I go to the window above the sink to open it, allowing the cool air in. I dig under the sink for a can of air freshener and go through the house, emptying the can. Not that I think it’s going to help; in about five minutes, the smell will go away and nothing will be refreshed. I’m pretty sure that can was left over from when my grandmother was still alive. Cracking a few more windows, I make sure the little tabs at the top are popped so someone can’t open them all the way. It’ll get cold in here soon, but at least the smell will get a little better.
It takes three trips to get all my bags to my room, and since there is nothing else to do, I go through them all, putting my dirty laundry in the hamper and my toiletries in the bathroom.
Everything reminds me of him.
It hurts more than it should, because it shouldn’t hurt at all. For the millionth time, I think that I shouldn’t waste my time on him since he clearly hasn’t thought of me. But it’ll take time. Now that I’ve decided I’m moving on, I need to accept that it will take time to forget Jaxon. Though we weren’t together long, it was serious, and that’s not something I can forget in just a few days—or a few weeks. And the reality is I may never forget him at all, but I do need to learn to live with the fact that we cannot be together.
Problem is, there is still that little voice in my head telling me he’s watching me, like he was before. It doesn’t make me as angry as it once did, and I don’t know what to think of that. Maybe I’m just over it.
When my bags are emptied, the contents scattered over my bed, I check my phone notifications.
LMCYTTWACYAGG: How’d you make out?
I so badly wanted to respond to his text telling me I was perfect with something that would get me a sexy pic in return, but I had to tell him that I was heading home and I’d message him when I could. It’s sweet of him to check up on me, and I hate that my morning was ruined and we couldn’t continue with our little game.
Golden_Phoenix: Currently lying in bed, my bedroom looking like a clothes-tornado made swooped through.
LMCYTTWACYAGG: Convenience of living alone, right? You can do what you want.
I huff a laugh and respond.
Golden_Phoenix: Do you live alone?
LMCYTTWACYAGG: Yes
Golden_Phoenix: It doesn’t get lonely?
LMCYTTWACYAGG: Sometimes. But I have you to keep me company now.
I smile, biting on my bottom lip. Instead of answering, I put my phone down and get up. I won’t give in so easily this time, even if we did already… uh, hook up? I don’t even know what to call that.
