“I was just... thinking about how things could’ve been so much worse with everything that happened with Jett drugging me and artificially inducing my heat,” I murmur.
Rage and Ash growl from behind me, the sound echoing off the walls of the box truck.
I glance over my shoulder and wince when I see their expressions.
The last thing I want to do is make any of them feel upset.
“Ahhh, yeah, that makes a lot of sense, Sweetheart,” Griffin says, his thumb brushing my cheek gently. Thetenderness he’s showing me and the emotions I’m feeling through the bond from him are so overwhelming I don’t know what to do.
There’s sadness, I think, for what I’ve been through, but there’s also a deep sense of admiration he’s feeling that doesn’t make any sense.
I can’t fathom why someone like him, someone so strong, both physically and emotionally, can view me that kind of way.
I’m pathetic. I cry too much. My pain tolerance is nonexistent. I don’t understand a lot of how the world works.
Naive. Stupid. Incompetent.
“Stop that,” Griffin says, a thread of command to his voice that has my brain stopping in its tracks.
“I don’t know what you were thinking, but the shit you were feeling? Not true.”
“Yeah,” I nod quickly. “You’re right. I’ve just got to figure out how to—how to move on.”
“You don’t have to ‘move on’ from something like that, Sugar,” Rowan says. “That shit takes time.”
I can sense Rowan’s anxious concern over me through our bond, even though it’s weaker than the one I have with Griffin.
“Oh. Well, I guess you’re right,” I say, worrying my bottom lip between my teeth.
“Remember what you do have,” Ash says.
Even though he seems to do his best to try to reassure me, his tone is still decidedly gruff. It makes my lips quirk up in a little smile as I glance at him over my shoulder.
He shrugs his shoulder, nodding at all of them. “You’ve got people behind you.”
I blink at him. He’s always been the one out of the four of them I’ve been most worried about, when it comes to accepting the rest of them, but he’s still offering me these words of reassurance.
“Yeah, I do,” I say, wiping at the tears clinging to my lower lashes before flashing them all a bright smile. “And youhave me.”
“We should get ready to head out,” Rowan says, stepping up behind me and resting a hand at the curve of my waist.
“Okay,” I say, waving to the guys.
Rowan helps me down from the truck bed and closes it up before sending a message on his phone. Probably to one of the drivers. They apparently leave with the guys earlier than Rowan does because it takes more time for them to set things up.
“How far away is this fight this time around?” I ask him as we drive back to his trailer on a golf cart.
“It’s actually closer than the last fight.” He reaches over and laces his hand with mine. “So a shorter drive with Jett.”
“Will your dad be there?”
“I don’t think so, not this time. I guess he trusts me enoughnot to fuck things up now.” He’s silent for a long time, his jaw working. I can sense through the bond the storm of emotions swirling in his chest.
I just wait patiently, until he’s ready to say something.
“I thought his approval would feel different,” he breathes. “I’m disappointed. I spent my whole life longing for something that pales in comparison to what I’ve got with you. It even pales in comparison to what I have with the other guys, you know?”
“I think your family are the type of people who wouldn’t ever love you in the way you deserve. But I’m biased. Cause I think you deserve all the love in the world.”
