“What happened, Lincoln?” I ask, my voice small even to my own ears.
He strides over and pulls me into his bulky warmth. “It might not be anything, T.”
“You just said—” I try to pull back and look to the television. Someone muted the sound—likely Dad.
“I know what I said. I’m so sorry, Tera.”
I nod and start crying. “The baby?”
“Yeah,” he answers hoarsely. “How are you feeling?”
“I really don’t know. I’m confused about it all. I think I’m still in shock.”
He nods as he presses a kiss to the top of my head.
“There’s something else.”
My stomach immediately knots with a sense of impending doom. I can feel it. I start to shake, my muscles weakening from fear.
“What did he do?” I ask. It can only be about Xander. Nothing else would, how did he put it? Kill me inside. There’s no way to brace for this. None. I don’t want to know. It’s going to destroy us. I just know it.
“There are photos…” he begins.
My breath hitches and I start to vomit, holding my hand over my mouth as I run to the kitchen garbage. Linc’s right there, holding my hair and holding me up. I don’t trust my legs to hold me upright.
I dry heave one last time, then rest my hands on the sides of the trash can as I take shaky breaths. The shaking is overwhelming now.
“I need to rinse my mouth.”
He walks me to the sink, where I rinse my mouth over and over with water, trying to get the disgusting taste out—but it’s more than just that I’m trying to cleanse.
I turn and Dad and Sandy are just taking their seats at the kitchen table. I look over. Ethan.
“E!” I try so hard to smile, but he doesn’t need it. He comes over and hugs me close.
“I am so fucking sorry, Tera.”
I nod. I know. They’re all sorry. So am I. But I have a feeling I’m going to be so much sorrier once I know whatever it is they’re trying to protect me from—but there is no point in delaying the inevitable.
“What did he do, E? It’s gotta be pretty bad if you’re here.” They just had a concert last night and a party afterward to celebrate their latest single hitting number one on the charts. “It must’ve been one hell of a party.”
Ethan sighs. “It’s not what it looks like.”
“What does it look like?” I ask, pulling back and walking over to the table. Linc pulls me onto his lap. I’m shaking so hard I’m surprised they can’t hear my bones rattling.
“Tera,” Dad begins. “There are some photos.”
I nod. “I g-got that part. I’m guessing Xander and—someone not me?”
He nods. “Yes.”
I nod and start crying again. I’m so sick of crying. Always crying. But this one—this one has me holding myself tightly inside and out, because it already hurts.
“It isn’t what it looks like,” Ethan reiterates. “I was there.”
“Again, wh-what does it look like?”
Ethan looks at his hands, then up to meet my eyes.
