"I better go," he says. He pauses, runs a finger down my cheek. "Be happy." With that, he turns and quickly walks away.
I take a steadying breath and see Shea looking at me questioningly. "I don't have romantic feelings for Carter, but I do love him. He's been such a big part of my life and I hate that he's hurting because of me."
"It can't be helped. You were his everything," she reminds me.
"He was mine, too."
"But he wasn't in love with someone else."
"No, he wasn't, but he knew."
She nods. "He did. He knew and it didn't matter to him at all. He wanted you any way he could get you for as long as he could."
"I don't get it. I'm no one special. I'm just some chick who struggles to get good grades and likes to paint."
"Not to him."
I sigh.
"Just breathe, T. He's a lot better than he was. If this had been right after you two broke up, he'd be destroyed."
"Gee, thanks for that," I say and throw a fry at her.
She picks it up and eats it. "Yeah, you don't need those fries. Hand them over. I don't have to worry about fitting into a dress."
I snort. "You sure as hell do. You're my maid of honor."
She groans. "I thought you'd forget about that."
I laugh. "Not likely, bestie. At least I chose blue instead of that salmon-pink thing the sales clerk showed us."
"If you'd have picked that one, we couldn't be friends anymore. My friends would never pick that color."
Carter's laughter drifts over from where he's sitting. It's faint, but I hear it. It's real and he sounds happy. Just six more months and we'll graduate. Yeah, we'll all be at the same college, but I don't think we'll see as much of each other as we do in our tiny high school. Then Carter won't see me and be sad anymore.
I really, really hope he finds his happy.
* * *
The restof the week flies by with exams. Imagine how bad I'd bomb if I was nervous about the wedding. That's something Xander didn't take into account. Men.
Today's my wedding day. I'm marrying Xander Mackenzie. I can't believe it.
Shea's mom comes over to do my hair and makeup, which I'm thankful for. It's not easy styling my long, very straight black hair. It's impossible for me to do anything with besides a ponytail or a messy bun, but Shea's mom puts it up into some intricate twist, leaving a few tendrils of curls to frame my face.
"You look beautiful, mija," Mrs. M says as she enters my room.
I stare at myself in the mirror then glance to her with a small smile. "Thanks."
"Nervous?"
"Not a bit."
Mrs. M stands behind me and smiles into the mirror. "That's how you know it's real."
"Nora said the same thing to me the other day. But I've always known it was real."
"And so has Xander. That boy was in love with you before he knew what love was," she reminds me.
