"You're lying, don't try to gaslight me, Noah." She tries to scramble off my lap, but I refuse to let her go, tightening my fingers until she winces from my grip. "It was her, wasn't it? You're fucking me and picturing Cordelie Wynyard instead?" Her hands shove against my chest, her sharp fingernails digging deep and bloodying me. "Oh my god! It was her! How could you do this to me, Noah!"
"You're being fucking ridiculous and dramatic, Joss! It was you I was picturing in my head, and maybe a bit of a porn video I watched earlier!" My hand fists the back of her head, and I force her to look at me as I dig my fingers into her hair. "You need to stop bringing Cordelie's name into every situation. She has nothing to do with us. It's getting pathetic, and I'm sick of it." My eyes glare into hers, and that moment of remorse all but disappears as my heart hardens. "If you want me to leave your skanky ass, or pass you around to my friends, just say so, Joss, 'cause this is getting tiresome and it's no longer fun."
Her lips tremble, and tears slide down her face, and instead of feeling sorry for her, the darkness inside of me rises unbidden. "Why are you watching porn? Am I not enough for you?" I roll my eyes at her stupidity. Of course, that is her major concern, and not the fact that I just threatened to pass her around to my friends. This girl is so damaged that it's a wonder she's not a complete mess.You helped shape this version of her. You're toxic, and destroy everyone around you.
I feel my compassion vacate the building, along with what little humanity I cling to. I bite down on her pouty, collagen-filled bottom lip until a drop of blood wells on the surface as she moans. "Because I want to, because I can, because sometimes you don't satisfy me, Joss, with your fake tits and your loose pussy. Sometimes I just need something more. Would you rather I had found someone else to fill those cravings?"
Every word is a dagger stabbing into her as she flinches from my cruelty. A part of me hopes she slaps me and kicks me out, so we can be done with the toxic relationship once and for all. The other part holds on to the fact that I don't want to be alone, and I know I will be. Josslyn, for all her faults, fills something inside of me. She helps to plug the rot that seeps from my pores and taints everything around me. Is it right to use her over and over to save myself?Absolutely not.Will it stop me from continuing to do it, if she doesn't smarten up and walk away from me?Nope.
"No, please, Noah. I'll do whatever you want. I'll let you use me any way you desire, baby." I use my thumb to wipe at the blood and slip it past her lips, as she twirls her tongue around it and sucks it deep into her mouth. Her tearful green eyes meet mine, and I feel myself growing hard once more underneath her, as I feel the desperation coming off of her in waves. Her pain and my cruelty have always been delicious toppings to our sexual experiences, and I don't see that changing any time soon. I'm a cruel and devious sadist, but Josslyn is a delusional masochist. We're a match made in hell.
"You'll do anything I want? You should be more careful with what you offer, Josslyn. Someone could really hurt you." Namely, me. I don't vocalize that part as I push her off my lap, and she goes tumbling to the floor as I widen my legs, stroke my hardening cock, and use my thumb to spread my precum along my engorged crown.
"I don't care, I'll do whatever you want as long as you don't leave me." She gulps as she gets up on her knees and crawls forward, rubbing her face against my inner thigh like a cat in heat, and licks one of my testicles. I slouch farther down on the couch and spread my legs wider so she can fit between them.
"Put that whore mouth of yours to good use and eat my ass, Joss." She doesn't hesitate to use her hands to grab onto my asscheeks, prying them apart before her tongue licks at my puckered hole. I groan loudly as I wrap my fingers around my shaft and stroke it, twisting and tugging on it as she licks from my rim to my balls, sucks one in her mouth, before releasing it and lashing my asshole again. My legs tremble as I hold them off the couch and slightly bent in the air, giving her better access, and my abdominal muscles constrict as desire courses through me. Her tongue breaches my walls, and it causes my next breath to stutter in my chest. "Fuck, that feels so good, baby. Fuck my ass harder with that dirty mouth of yours." She licks, sucks, and moans as I jerk off, my head tilted back in pleasure. "You want to prove to me that you'll do anything for me, Joss?" I groan as I think of ways to hurt and push her away, even though right now my body doesn't want that. It wants me to continue to receive the pleasure she's willingly producing.
I think of Cordelie, and if I'd ever demand that she do this to me, but my immediate reaction is that I wouldn't. Cordelie is too soft and gentle for my depravity. Then again, based on what she's signed up for, and her fantasies, maybe she wasn't ever the fragile princess I treated her as. Perhaps I could have been a little rougher, and we both would have enjoyed that.
"Anything. I'll do anything for you, Noah," Josslyn moans as she licks my ass, and one of her fingers slips inside my puckered hole, thrusting lightly. I stroke myself harder and quicker, the beginnings of my orgasm already rising as she massages my prostate, and she licks my testicles like a damn ice cream cone.Fuck, I should feel bad about using her, but it's so hard to do when she's licking my ass like a champ. "You taste so good, Noah. I'll never get tired of pleasuring you."
Fuck. This girl should really think about being a porn star, or starring on one of those subscription sites. Guaranteed, she'd make a lot more money doing that than with the art degree she's pursuing. Maybe I can be kind enough to help her realize that, while taking a small percentage for my efforts. I'm all about helping others find their potential. "Tonight, you're going to allow me, and whoever I choose, to share your gaping pussy. You'll be passed around and have your holes filled, and all you can do is say yes. Do you still want me, baby? Are you still willing to do anything to keep me?"God, please say no, please get up and leave, maybe even punch me in the balls, God knows I would deserve it.
I raise my head and stare down at her between my legs as she stops licking, and freezes with her finger deep inside my ass, but it's no longer moving.Come on, Josslyn, show me you have a backbone.A tear slips from the corner of her eye, and I can see how much I'm hurting her, yet I don't give a shit, and I won't stop. My hand tightens on my cock, squeezing the life out of it, knowing I'm an asshole and a psycho for what I'm doing to her, but I want to get off, and the thought of sharing her, letting her be abused by other men, makes my cock harder.
"Yes." She leans forward and licks the base of my cock, and a shiver races up my spine. Fuck, I tried, I tell myself, but I know I didn't try hard enough. I should walk away and never look back. It would be a small mercy compared to how I'm hurting her now, and how I crave to hurt her even worse.
My strokes pick up speed, and I tilt my cock toward her mouth as she rises further on her knees, reaches for my cock with her other hand, wraps her fingers tightly around the crown, and her finger in my ass meets the tempo of my rhythm. I groanloudly as my cum spurts in her mouth, and she swallows. Fuck, this feels so good even though it shouldn't. I'm going to hell for everything I'm doing to these women. "Show me," I demand, and she opens her lips wide, showing me a glob of my cum on her tongue. "Swallow, slut."
She does, and I push her hand away from my ass and rub my hands through my messy hair, feeling some of my desperation once more descend on me like a weighted blanket that wishes to suffocate me. "Noah, you know I love you, right?" Josslyn questions as she wipes at her lips.
Everything in me wants to scream at her that she should love herself, and get as far away from me as she can before I drag her further into the gutter with me, but I don't. I can't. I'm selfish after all. There's a panic beginning in my chest, making it feel like something is constricting me, and the one thought blaring through my head is that I need to see Cordelie, even if it's from afar. Only she can soothe my soul. Only seeing her brings me a semblance of peace. "Didn't you say there was a party on campus tonight?" I question and reach for my pants, slipping them on and refusing to meet Josslyn's gaze.
She gets up from the floor, her body shaking like at any moment she's going to break into sobs, and I know if she does, I'll be out of here so quick I'll leave skid-marks on the rug. "Yeah, do you want to go?" I can hear the hesitancy and uncertainty in her voice. She's worried about what I said would happen to her tonight, or maybe she's just concerned I'll leave despite that. The truth is, I probably will. I'm a bastard after all, but I did give her the chance to save herself, and she didn't take it.
"Yeah, baby, we're gonna go. Why don't you go get yourself cleaned up right now?" She nods, but I still see the fear in her features that she's failing to hide. If I have any luck, tonight Josslyn will grow a backbone and kick me to the curb, and I can still get to see Cordelie. All in all, it might be a good night. I pullout my phone once I hear the shower running, and log in to the Valentine's app.
Baby, I'm going to do so much more than choke you. Every one of your holes will be filled with my cum until it's pouring out of you. Send me a pic of your pretty pussy, so I can have sweet dreams tonight.
CHAPTER 11
NOAH
"Shit, Cordie's looking like a snack," Tyler groans like a jackass as he smacks his lips together, like he has the slightest chance of taking a bite out of my sweet baby girl. I'll rip his fucking beating heart out of his chest first before he can even touch her. He laughs like something he said is funny, and it reminds me of a donkey braying. "Sorry, man, I forgot for a sec you were with her before." He raises a dark, bushy eyebrow questioningly, and I feel how suddenly invested Josslyn is in our conversation. "You don't mind, right, if I try to hit that? You're with Josslyn now."
I want to immediately punch him in the throat and make him choke on his damn tongue. So much for thinking of letting this fucker be the one to help me spit-roast Josslyn tonight. I glance toward Josslyn and catch how intently she's looking at me, with her arms crossed against her chest, causing her breasts to rise and partially slip over the edge of her shirt, and ensuring she has every male within our vicinity's attention. If she's attempting to make me jealous, she's fucking deluded. I know she sleeps with other guys on the side, despite telling me constantly that sheloves me. I don't know how she's forgotten that just an hour ago, I told her I'd be sharing her with anyone I want tonight.
"Right, yeah, man, I'm with Josslyn. What Cordelie does is none of my business," I grit through clenched teeth and force myself to look casual, even though right now I'm picturing grabbing a knife from the kitchen of this house and slitting this motherfucker's throat, coating the walls with his blood as a warning to all the other cunts looking at Cordelie.
From the corner of my eye, I see Josslyn's pleased smile, and it puts me further on edge. She turns away and starts gossiping to her gaggle of friends again, and I release the breath I didn't even realize I was holding. I raise my beer to my lips to take another covert glance at Cordelie, who's across the room drinking and laughing with Faye, and a few of their friends. God, she looks fantastic in that short, black leather dress that's tight over her small breasts, shows off her small waist, and flares over her hips that I miss holding. Her long dark hair is up in a sleek, high ponytail, exposing her swan-like neck that I long to nuzzle. She's so beautiful that it fucking hurts me to look at her. Right now, she seems so happy, even though I've caught her glancing my way. Did you miss seeing me, baby, like I miss seeing you?
"God, her ass looks so good in that skirt, I'm going to make sure I fuck her from behind so I can watch it jiggle," Tyler groans to Mike, one of my former teammates, and I hear him mutter his agreement. I'm going to kill all of these assholes, every single one of them that's looking at her, but before I do, I'm going to stab out their eyes. What the fuck happened to bro code?Are you really calling someone out for their morals? Shall we have a recap of yours lately?
"Hey, can you hold my beer for a sec?" Tyler thrusts his beer into my hand as he pulls out his phone and presses it into his ear, yelling into it to be heard over the music. It's the perfect opportunity to teach this fucker a lesson without facing anyconsequences, and if he's not able to go after Cordelie, then I'll have killed two birds with one stone. I'm nothing if not efficient.
I discreetly reach into my pocket, while watching to make sure no one else is observing what I'm doing, and pull out the baggie with the pills I picked up from my supplier to sell here tonight. I slip four Addies into his beer bottle and give it a quick shake. When he's done on the phone, I pass the bottle back to him and watch him take a deep gulp, as satisfaction coats my insides. "Thanks, man, that was Joe, he's on his way over."
"Sounds good, looks like it's about to be a real party. I'm gonna grab another beer, drink yours up, and I'll bring you another one." I wink in his direction and move away from him. I need to make sure I'm nowhere near this fucker when he starts foaming at the mouth, so no one links him with me. My eyes slide back to my sweet baby girl, and I see one of the baseball guys shooting his shot and hitting on her. She giggles at something he's saying and places her hand against his chest, and I feel like my heart's going to rip out of my chest.See, she's moving on from you. She doesn't need or want you. She can barely remember what you had together, except maybe for the misery.
