She openly frowns, urging me to continue.
“This tie, what do you remember about it when it happened?”
I look away. There’s some things that I'd like to take with me when I pass through the veil.
The horrors of that moment are too dark to repeat.
The chittering of crickets and little reptiles fill the silence.
I absorb the unique beauty of where we are while my mind battles itself. Large blooms grow along the veins that hang low.
“Kassiel?” Her concerned voice is quiet.
I clear my throat and look back at her.
“The best I can describe it—” I swallow the words. I don’t want her to think of me any differently.
I change the subject and point towards where the trail disappears into the forest. “Is this the way to Naaveen’s?”
Her smile is bittersweet and she closes her eyes briefly.
“It is. I think he can help us with understanding how to break your bond.”
“So that’s why we set off so quickly?” I ask.
She studies me, “We don’t have much time before the next eclipse, and I’m not willing to share you anymore.” Her cheeks turn bright pink as she looks away.
“So this is why you ask about the ritual?”
She nods her head. “The king thinks he can keep you, it…does things to me. It’s like a stirring of darkness wants to peel back my skin and let rage consume me. People are not meant to be bartered with. They are not meant to be kept.”
She’s right, of course. We’re not meant to be caged and used when it advances someone's position of power.
My voice shakes with the sudden admittance that forms on my lips, something I thought I’d never repeat to anyone but Rune.
“Then I’ll tell you, Alora, what I remember from that night.”
I grab her hand and begin, “In a moment of survival, I chose to not surrender. Instead, I fought him.”
I look away as the words feel too heavy, “Because of that, there’s parts of me stained and marked by my punishment.”
She waits, giving me space to sit with myself and speak on my terms.
“King Euron is not a benevolent man, especially when someone doesn’t do what he wants.”
I clench and unclench my fists.
“When the Siorai Ban is performed, all who are linked to the king are there. So for my bonding, it was a few oracle witches and Rune, and obviously King Euron.”
She begins to move slowly along the path and it’s a relief to be moving again.
“The witches said the body needed to be willing, and I was too combative, so they lit herbs I wasn’t familiar with while also giving me a sedative which they forced me to drink. I felt like I was out of my body.”
Her brows furrow more as her lips turn into a flat line.
Continuing, I add, “I’m thankful I don’t remember everything. But they called on my essence, my magic. They had stones that glowed a bright crimson though they were blacker than the darkest night, and the witch drew symbols on it that she had pulled from my essence. She said that my soul had fractured, so she stitched it whole again, which feels a lot like your body being licked by fire. And then she somehow pulled the wretched thing out of my body and floated it above me.”
I try to recall the memory, to imagine the wisp of my soul that shimmered in the dark firelight.
