I planned to knock on the door and throw myself at her mercy for a change, and if she wasn’t there or if she was with a client, well then, I’d wait.The idea of her with someone else twisted something in my gut but she was worth it.I couldn’t love her and expect her to change who she was or give up what she’d built because it made me uncomfortable.I was man enough to deal with her work.
I rapped on the door and waited, ready to prostrate myself at the first sign of her softening.I waited for so long; I’d almost given up by the time the door opened and she stood in front of me, wearing yoga pants and my Tulane shirt she’d taken with her when she left me.Seeing her in my clothes hit every one of my possessive buttons and then I noticed the red rims around her eyes and my heart broke all over again.She’d been crying, and it was my fucking fault.
“Why are you here?”She squared her shoulders like she was steeling herself against something—against me—but she shifted her body just enough to let me enter.
“First to tell you I’m sorry.”I’d worked out the order on the ride over.Apology first, then declaration of undying love.
“For what?You were just doing what we agreed to,” she said, crossing her arms over her chest.She couldn’t be more unavailable to me if she was wrapped in chains and padlocked.But she wasn’t mostly naked with a client, so I’d take my wins where I could get them.
“I made a mistake.I never should have made you that offer.”
“I don’t understand.You just offered to extend what we were already doing.”
This apology thing wasn’t going the way I’d pictured it.I looked at the set of her jaw and saw the whole thing heading south fast.
“I love you.I should have told you right away instead of trying to get you to quit your business.I don’t know how to make any of this work out, but Alex, I want to try.”
“What?”Her eyes were the size of saucers, but she’d relaxed her grip on herself, which had to be a positive sign.
“The client thing.I’m not normally jealous.I’ll try to find a way to compartmentalize so I can deal with your work.You’ve built a business that’s important to you.It’s not fair for me to expect you to give it up.”I’d started out wanting to ruin her.It was kind of funny how things worked out sometimes.
“I meant the other thing.The love thing.”
“Oh,” I said, not bothering to try to hide my smile.“I love you like crazy.I want to fall asleep with you in my arms every night and wake up with you every morning.I understand if you’re not there yet.I can be patient.”It would be hard as hell, but even saying the words aloud eased the tension I’d been carrying in my chest the past couple of days.Alex was worth waiting for.
“I love you too.”
I didn’t give her a chance to take the words back or qualify them.I closed the distance between us in two strides and scooped her up in my arms, kissing her until the ache in my heart started to wane, replaced with something warmer.Hotter.
I tunneled my hands into her hair, anchoring her in place for my mouth.She met me with a hunger of her own, her tongue finding mine, tasting and teasing as we breathed each other in.
“We’ll figure out the work thing.I promise,” I said when I managed to break the kiss.I wanted to take her right there on the floor, to slide inside her and claim her, but I needed her to know I wouldn’t try to change her.That I loved her exactly the way she was—job and all.
“I’m closing the Gentleman’s Submissive.I don’t want to do it anymore.”
“Why?Not for me?”I couldn’t take it if she grew to resent me for taking her away from something she loved.
“Not entirely.”She searched my face with her gaze and I found myself getting distracted by the look in her eyes.A look I’d gotten glimpses of but hadn’t recognized before.Love.
“I had a client scheduled for this afternoon.For now, actually, but I couldn’t go through with it.After what we did together, anything other than genuine surrender made me feel like a fake.And I didn’t want to surrender to anyone but you.You see my dilemma.”
“I do.”
“I thought I might skip the academic thing and go straight to writing my book.It’s what I wanted to do from the beginning and I’ve got enough money saved to give it a try for a couple of months.If I can’t sell it, I’ll figure something else out.”
“You’ll sell it,” I said, as sure of her success as I was of things like gravity.The woman I loved was beautiful and brilliant and had a unique way of looking at the world.I had no doubt she’d master whatever she turned her attention to as easily as she’d mastered me.
“I don’t have to figure it out now.”She linked her fingers with mine and brought our joined hands to her lips.“I was planning on salving my broken heart withOutlanderreruns and Scotch.We could go home and I could read to you instead.”
I fucking loved the way it sounded when she said home.
“We do it naked, and you try not to come while I do my best to make you.”
“Is that a dare?”she asked, her eyes shining mischievously.
“Absolutely.”I wrapped my arms around her, fitting her body to mine and feeling at home for the first time since she’d walked out my door.
“Deal,” she whispered the second before her lips met mine and the world dissolved into Alex and me and the love we’d make together.
