The simple answer is love had made me blind to everything but the opportunity to reacquaint with my man.
You mean, her man.
That harsh comment has me texting my supervisor to call off sick as the tears streaming down my face increase in frequency. That reminder has me wanting to fall into a sinkhole until the pain is gone. I have always believed that women who messed with married men were soulless piranhas, and now someonecould easily put me in that same category. My shoulders sag with heaviness, and my heart aches for unknowingly falling into a group I’ve always despised.
Me:
Good morning. I’m sick and won’t be in today.
Joyce:
Oh no. Alright, sweetie. Feel better. See you on Monday.
My supervisor, Joyce, is one of the best bosses I’ve ever worked for, so her reply isn’t surprising. As a public inquiries assistant, I can work from home. But after what I’ve been through overnight, I don’t feel up to forcing myself to focus on work. Now that I’ve taken care of that, I go to another thread and send a message.
Me:
SOS, bitches! I need y’all today. I’ve called off work because some shit went down. *crying emoji*
Before I can exit the group message between Jandra, Paula, and me, my phone vibrates with an incoming call. “This mothafucka got a lot of nerve.” Seeing Kelvin’s name flashing on my screen instantly boils my blood as my temple vein pulses and my lip curls. Hitting ignore on the call, I lock my phone and set it down on the bed before heading to the bathroom to shower and attend to my morning routine. After showering, I put the dress back on sans panties, and it’s no longer presentable due to the wrinkles, since I didn’t have a chance to retrieve my spinnanight bag last night.
“Had that goofy—” Boisterous laughter escapes my mouth, cutting off whatever I was about to say when Zakai’s name forKelvin leaves my mouth. A light feeling in my chest is the fuel I need to effortlessly leave this hotel within twenty minutes.
“I got Hennessy, Stella Rose, Don Julio, and Grey Goose because I’m not sure what type of time we need to be on,” Jandra says when I open my door a few hours later.
“Mhm. I have the white cheddar popcorn, roasted cashews, Doritos, and ingredients to make some chicken nachos,” Paula tells me, stepping in after Jandra while holding up several grocery bags full of stuff.
All I can do is smile while taking breaths to prevent my lips from trembling and the unshed tears from falling. Knowing that, despite it being the last day of the work week, my girls dropped everything to come see about me increases my vulnerability.
“I see the mist in your eyes. Bring your ass in this kitchen so you can tell us what the hell is going on. If I need to call Landon to make sure we have bail money in the account, tell me now,” Jandra says.
“That part. What they don’t have, my man and I do. Tell us what’s going on. I was in the middle of enjoying that newly committed dick when your text came through,” Paula interjects.
Paula Greathouse and I have been friends since we met in the fifth grade. She recently got engaged to her longtime boyfriend, Jasper, leaving me as the only single person in our three-person circle of friends.
Leading the way to my kitchen, I sigh and mentally prepare myself to regurgitate the destruction of my relationship with Kelvin. Marriage and family are two things I desire to have, and now I’m no closer to obtaining them than I was before entering into a courtship that has proven to be a waste of time. Not tomention how low I have been feeling since arriving home after an encounter with two men who left me broken on the same night.
“Kelvin is married.” The three words tumble from my lips like vomit a second after I cross the threshold of the kitchen.
Silence bounces around the room, which I don’t acknowledge right away, since my focus is on the small rectangular box on the counter. Thanks to the lotion and softness of the two-ply paper, my face isn’t red and blotchy from the constant wiping I’ve been doing on and off since my arrival at home. Between pacing and crying, I have been in a constant state of torment that I’m unsure how to pull myself out of. This isn’t how I saw things going between Kelvin and me. Then, to catch a glimpse of Zakai’s tenderness, only for him to disappear without a trace, has me feeling extremely raw.
“Run that back one time for the one time.” Paula’s voice forces me to turn and face her and Jandra, whose expression is clouded with anger.
“What do you mean, Kelvin is married?” Jandra asks in a harsh tone that has me swallowing over the lump in my throat.
Trust me, I would shave off my head continuously for a year if I could remove my knowledge of that truth from the chambers of my heart.
I take a few minutes to run everything down from the time I arrived at the hotel bar until his wife interrupted what was planned to be a great night welcoming my man back home.
“Where does he live?” Jandra asks once I’m done talking.
“Where does his mammy live?” Paula asks simultaneously.
Those two questions have me wishing the floor would open and swallow me up as my response feels like acid exiting my mouth.
“Good questions.” I shrug, realizing for the first time that I have never been to Kelvin’s place of residence.Wow. I really was the other woman, huh? This shit is crazy.
“See, this is the problem. Too many women don’t ask enough damn questions for me. Fuck that Stella Rose. We’re drinking Henny because I need Henny-thing to happen by nightfall,” Jandra says, walking to the cabinet where I keep my array of shot glasses.
