“‘Tis the only one we need at the moment.” He faced her fully now. “Ye heard everything back in the hall. The girls want joy, and the castle needs a sense of calm. A cèilidh gives each of those a place to sit and breathe.”
She took a step closer. “Ye say if I agree, yet ye speak as if it is set.”
“It can be both.”
“It cannae,” she countered. “Nae when ye plan in front of me and call it choice.”
His eye did not soften. “I willnae let MacGee set the story.Iwill set it first.”
“With me as the tale,” she said.
“With ye as the woman folks must respect to step into me yard,” he corrected. “If he comes to the gate and bows, then every tongue that think ye were dangerous and a traitor will mark the bow before they try the word again. Why can ye nae see that this benefits ye and yer maither as well?”
She let out a breath that felt like it had snagged on something inside her. “Ye ken ye are trying really hard to put me off of marrying ye. I cannae marry a man who speaks as if me life is a ledger.”
“Well, if we assume it is one, then let us assume that yer life is a line I intend to keep out of the red,” he said.
Her laugh was small and devoid of humor. “Oh, ye are really good at this, are ye nae? The highly diplomatic Laird MacMillan.”
He did not flinch. “It is a war of small pieces. I mean to win it.”
“By inviting a man who threatened me to our dance,” she said. “To me dance.”
He held her gaze. “To show him that he isnae feared here. To show others that they need nae fear him either. He will be watched. Trust me, he will either behave or wish he had. Either way, nay harm will come to ye.”
She swallowed. Words crowded her tongue and would not leave. “Ye cannae tell me I am safe and then invite the enemy into our walls. Which is it, Alex? Am I safe or nae?”
“Ye are,” he assured. “And the earlier ye see that the cèilidh is also me trying to protect ye, the better.”
“And me opinion on any of this?” Her voice thinned. “Does it weigh a thing?”
He did not answer at once. When he did, it was with the same calm that infuriated her. “It weighs as much as me oath,” he said. “I willnae leave ye undefended.”
“I didnae ask for a feast,” she said. “I asked for time.”
“And this is how I buy it,” he said.
They stood in the hallway with the soft sound of the hall behind the door, voices rising and falling, the household moving forward on the strength of a decision that did not feel like hers.
Erica folded her arms to keep from reaching for anything that would hold. “Ye spoke me name in there as if I had chosen,” she said. “Folks heard it. They will tell others.”
“Aye,” he said.
“Then ye will be careful how ye speak it next.”
A muscle ticked in his jaw. He did not apologize. He did not explain further.
“The steward will come for ye later with lists,” he said. “Say what ye will about flowers and food. Put what ye want in the yard. The food we eat can be decided by ye.”
She stared at him. “The food we eat,” she repeated.
She knew what he was doing, but she was still a bit too upset to call him out on it. He was trying to make her think she had some control over this whole thing, when the opposite was the case.She never had.And a voice in the back of her mind whispered that she never would.
He nodded as if she had given him a fact to file. He stepped past her then, close enough that his sleeve brushed her hand.
“Rest,” he said, the word a habit he could not seem to drop. “I have work to do.”
“Of course ye do,” she said.
