“Why did you break up?”
“I didn’t want to give up my dream of working on a farm. He didn’t like that I had to get up so early to get to uni, or to whatever farm I was doing placements on. I woke him up. And then I was tired when I got home.”
“Did you discuss living somewhere a bit more equidistant from what you both wanted to do?”
“I suggested it.”
“But?” He stands and jumps over the brook.
I follow. “He said it wouldn’t work. What was the point in us both having to do extra travel?”
“So he let you do all the travelling and made you feel guilty about it?”
I clench my teeth. “I didn’t say that.”
“You didn’t have to. Did he end it, or did you?”
I hunch my shoulders. “He asked me to choose.”
“Between your dream and him?”
I nod.
“And you chose your dream?”
“I hesitated. He said that was enough of an answer and that we should break up.”
“Did you agree?”
My eyes sting with tears. “No. I told him I’d try harder to make it work.”
“And?”
“He said I shouldn’t have hesitated. That it was proof I loved farm life more than him, so what was the point?” I hug myself. My throat is raw, my vision blurred.
“No offence, but he sounds like a selfish arsehole.”
“It wasn’t like that,” I rasp. “Maybe he was right.”
“And the fact you believe that shows he did a right number on you.”
“A what?”
“Sorry. That's a Yorkshire-ism. He wanted everything his way and made you feel bad if it wasn’t.”
I shake my head, wanting to deny it, but I can’t.
“You don’t owe him anything,” Angus says.
We walk out of the trees, onto a hill that overlooks a village.
“Wow,” I whisper.
“It’s a nice view, isn’t it?”
“Gorgeous.”
“I might not enjoy farm life, but I wouldn’t want to give up being close to views like this for the world. It’s one of the reasons I’ll never stray far from Leeds. No matter how close to the centre you live, you don’t have to go far to end up somewhere like this. It’s big, but notso massive that you ever feel disconnected from nature.”
