“Come on, Bess, I need you to get dressed and get out of here.Please, hurry.”
My body was shaking so hard I had trouble covering myself up so Ken was forced to help me.I remember him walking me out to my car, telling me to drive straight home, and not talk to anyone.
“Tell me he killed that fucker,” Hugo snarls, snapping me back to the present as he jumps to his feet.
I catch sight of the anguish on Savvy’s face and the rage on Hugo’s.They had not interrupted me once, until now.
“I didn’t know at the time,” I convey.“I never saw him again.Not at the apartment that night, or any time after.”
Savvy grabs on to Hugo’s sleeve and urges him to sit back down.
“How did you get home?”she gently asks me.
“Ken ended up having to drive me in my car.I remember Mom wasn’t home and I went straight upstairs.He ran a bath for me, took care of my clothes, and then left before she came home.”
“And no one ever approached you about him?”
“No.I mostly stayed close to home after that, and rarely went out by myself.”
“You never even told your mom what happened?”she probes.
I shake my head.“No.She never knew.”
I didn’t see the point.What was done, was done, and all it would’ve accomplished was to upset her.She’d tried so hard to keep me safe, I’d rather she think she succeeded.There’d been one point I was tempted.Mom had been in the ICU battling sepsis after what should’ve been a routine gall bladder surgery, and things were not looking good.She told me if there was anything I wanted to tell her, to do it then.She died eight hours later, knowing nothing more than she’d kept her little girl safe, and I’m glad for it.
“Did you at least see a doctor?”Hugo suddenly asks.
“No.Not until a few years later when I was in college and was having some symptoms I thought might be related, but that turned out to be cancer.”
“Cancer?”
The outburst comes from both of them.
Oh, God.I’m making a mess of this.
“Endometrial cancer, but that was eighteen years ago.I’m fine now.I’m so sorry,” I add, apologizing for yet another little part of myself I haven’t let them in on.
I’m oh for two at the moment, and I haven’t even gotten to the most egregious of my lies, or omissions.It’ll only increase the divide I can already feel growing.Something Savvy’s next comment only confirms.
“Jesus, Bess.Is there anything else we need to brace for?”
“Yes,” I answer her honestly.“One more thing, probably the most important thing you need to know.”
Hugo surges to his feet and turns to the window, his arms crossed in front of him and his back to me.The body language couldn’t be clearer if he’d hung a sign around his neck.But I started this, and I need to see it through.It’s the right thing to do, even if it comes two decades too late.
“When Ken was arrested, one of his charges was for a violent home invasion.I didn’t find out until he already had a trial date that home invasion took place on the same day he found me in his apartment.”
I lean forward with my elbows on my knees.
“My brother was with me, looking after me at the time those people were assaulted and robbed in their own home.He’d refused to speak to me, but I’d been ready to speak up on his behalf, and was shocked when he pled guilty to all charges.”
“Are you saying he pled guilty for something he didn’t do?”Savvy wants clarified.
“Yes.And when I asked him why, he told me he was better off in jail, and that if I were ever to speak a word to anyone about where he really was that night, I would get him killed.”
“Because he found Joon raping you and killed him,” Hugo states, his voice oddly level.
“Yes, but I swear I didn’t know until then.I never asked what happened to him and we never talked about that night.Maybe some part of me suspected, I’m not really sure what I thought at the time, but that was the first time he told me straight up he’d killed him.”
