“I think you need your coffee,” Gwen teases me.
She’s right about that. Even though I’m still drunk from Will’s pelvic sorcery, the bliss I feel won’t save me from needing my caffeine.
“Morning, beautiful,” Will says, glancing up at me without missing a beat in feeding Julian. The corners of his eyes crinkle, and I can’t help but smile back. “There’s fresh coffee in the pot. I’d offer to make it for you, but …” He raises his arms slightly to showcase Julian. “Got my hands full.”
“I can’t believe you didn’t wake me. I kind of panicked when I woke up.” I give him a slight frown. I’m not mad; I’m grateful. But if I can get a bit of an upper hand in this power dynamic, I won’t miss the chance to do so.
“I figured you needed some extra rest after last night,” Will says, his eyes sparkling as he chuckles. My cheeks flush again. “And the girls helped me whip up breakfast.” He nods toward Gwen and Heather, who sit at the table, grinning from ear to ear.
I can’t even pretend to be upset. I’m too overwhelmed. “Thank you,” I murmur, swallowing the lump in my throat. I join the girls at the table, where they’ve left me some leftovers—scrambled eggs, toast, and fresh fruit.
That’s when I realize I’m royally fucked.
I’m in love with this man.
I love his playfulness and how it doesn’t come at the cost of a deep kindness. I love his generosity, his unwavering care for us, the way everything he does is aflame with passion.
I said it myself …Make love to me, Will.That’s exactly what we did. And he didn’t run out on me. He’s right here, offering me support, not looking anywhere close to running away toward the next woman he can find?—
I’m suddenly flooded with terror, its icy fingers gripping me from the inside. I try to ignore it as I sit at the table and jointhe conversation with my girls. I even try to get a few bites of breakfast into my system, but my mind is miles away.
This morning—and last night—is everything I want and more. But the thought of taking this leap again after Matthew is terrifying. Nausea grips me, and I do my best to swallow the food to get those calories in; that breast milk won’t produce itself.
What if I’m wrong again? Ten years ago, I took a chance on Matt, even though his best friend ruinedmybest friend’s evening. And while I can’t say I completely regret it, since without him I wouldn’t have my kids, I know for certain that I was wrong about him.
What if I turn out exactly like my mom? What if I have rotten judgement and keep falling for terrible men who cheat on me?
Will has never, ever shown commitment towards a woman. What’s so special about me that he’d break that habit?
I’m brought back to the present when Will’s hand covers mine. “You okay?”
Shit. I smile and nod. “Mhmm.”
Will frowns. He knows better than to believe that lie. But he also knows better than to ask me about it in front of the kids. So, he takes the hint and changes the subject. “My sister texted me earlier, and she’s inviting us over to her place for dinner.”
“Us?” I blink. “Like, all of us?”
“Yeah. She’s Cayce and Corey’s mom. The girls would have a great time.” He squeezes my hand in encouragement. “So how about it?”
“Mom, say yes!” Gwen pleads. “Cayce said he has all the characters fromBlueyas toys at his house!”
I look at Will, who’s encouraging me with his eyes. I think I can swallow back my worries for today and go meet someone new. After all, I’ve been complaining about having little to no social life. Hell, I might even become friends with Will’s sister. And since she has kids, she knows the struggle.
“I’d love to,” I confirm, and both Heather and Gwen erupt into a fit of hoorays.
All four kids and Julian are playing with Will and Karan in the living room while Rachel and I chop onions for the French onion soup she’s got in store. At first, Rachel shyly refused my offer to help, but I wasn’t about to sit at this table and chat with her while just watching her work. So, I relented until she gave in.
Rachel is not at all what I expected, seeing as she’s Will’s sister and all. I expected a feisty, confident woman. But although Rachel and Will are basically identical—they share the same angular features, chestnut hair, and almond eyes, although hers are green—her demeanour couldn’t be more different from Will’s.
When we first arrived through her door, she greeted me politely while her husband Karan scooped me up in a big bear hug. Her narrow shoulders were stooped forward, her long, pin-straight hair partially in front of her face, as if to hide herself away. At first, I thought coming here was a mistake since she hardly seemed to want me here. But, as it turns out, she’s just shy. When it was just the two of us in the kitchen, she slowly started warming up to me, and now I can see that she’s definitely happy I came.
“You know,” she starts as she finishes up the last onion in the pile, “it’s been years since Will has introduced me to someone.”
“Yeah, but it’s not like this was his idea,” I retort with a snort. “Weren’t you the one who invited me and the kids to come over?”
“Yeah, I did.” She smiles softly and stops cutting. “Because he talked about you.”
“Okay?”
