“All this time, I’ve loved you. And I never knew if I could ever tell you. Because I didn’t really think you loved me back. Not like this. I didn’t imagine someone could love me like this.”
My heart swells and screams all at once. “I did,” I whisper against his chest. “I really did. I do.”
CHAPTER23
I’m staring at my screen, still not 100 percent sure I clearly understood what Leslie just said to me. “I’m sorry, what?” It’s only been a few days since I’ve been back home to my apartment, and my mind is still too busy replaying the breakup over and over to focus on anything else.
“Avery, your writing is nothing short of genius. Don’t look so surprised! We’d be lucky to have you on retainer.” Leslie’s eyes are sparkling with excitement.
“I …” I knew I’d nailed it, but this is much more than I’d expected. “I would love to, Leslie.”
“Oh, and you absolutely must come to experience the retreat yourself,” she continues.
My heart skips a beat. “Really?”
“Of course! If you’re going to be writing for us long-term, you’re worth the investment, darling.”
“I’d love to,” I reply, my voice meek. I’m trying to sound grateful for the opportunity. But I’m out of money. There’s no way I can pay for airfare to get there.
How can I tell her that without sounding completely pathetic?
“But it might be a little difficult, what with the?—”
“Nonsense,” she interrupts, a big smile on her face. “Since you’ll be writing more content for us, it only makes sense for you to truly experience everything Prakriti Mountain Wellness has to offer. It’s our responsibility to help you go through the experience.”
“What are you saying?” I don’t dare hope she’s saying what I think she’s saying.
“I’m saying we’ll be sponsoring the trip.”
I don’t know how to feel. First off, it seems too good to be true. I’m still reeling from heartbreak and barely holding it together, so I dare not hope. This stupid apartment just doesn’t feel like home anymore. This was Jasper’s home. Another life entirely. The last thing I want is to be here, alone … despite telling Logan I want to be alone.
But now I’m being given a second chance at a retreat. A chance to heal.
I explode into tears, unable to hold back. And I can’t help the shame that crawls into my stomach. This is completely unprofessional of me.
But before I can explain myself or apologize, Leslie chimes in:
“And it looks like you’ll be needing it, too.”
“You have no idea,” I say through my tears.
* * *
By the next morning, I’ve got a plane ticket booked for North Carolina that’s leaving in two days. But I can’t leave just yet. I still have one piece of unfinished business. So I swallow my pride and text Sophie.
I’ve been a major jerk and I’m sorry. I’m back in town. Can we please talk?
I crash on my couch and stare out the window while hopefully waiting for her reply. The office building staring back at me is still the same as ever. Like always, I can see the workaholic who’s almost always in his office. He’s still hunched over like he’s starting to morph into his desk.
It’s so weird. It really feels like nothing has changed. But I’m so bruised and battered that, in another way, everything is different. I have absolutely no idea where to even begin with myself now that I’ve made it clear I want to heal.
I do have one thing going for me—I know exactly what to expect when I land in the Blue Ridge Mountains. I’ve spent so long writing about it that I know everything I need to know about the Panchakarma cleanse I’ll soon get to experience.
My phone vibrates against my thigh, and my heart skips a beat. I look at the screen and immediately sigh in relief at the sight of Sophie’s name.
Was about time you came back. Come on over in like an hour or so. Heather’s sleeping.
My heart leaps in my throat. I can’t leave Montreal again without speaking to Sophie. Not only do I want to apologize in person for cursing her out when she was right about me, but I have to let her know what I’ve done.
