Baily settled into her arms a little more. “Why does she have a pet mouse?” she asked tiredly.
I set the box down on the coffee table. “It was all she had left,” I answered, feeling that familiar anger burn under my skin. “She needed something to hold onto.”
Baily offered a small smile, sliding her little hand overOlivia’s where the sweater had pulled up, revealing those angry scars of hers. “I think she still does,” she said, more awake now. “I think maybe that’s why she’s still so sick. She doesn’t have anything holding her feet on the ground. Mama’s holding me down. She needs someone to hold her down.”
Was that her problem with me? She lost her tether? Would my gift give it back to her? Remind her that I was still holding her feet firmly on this world?
I nodded, feeling the burn behind my eyes. “Yeah, kid, I think that’s exactly it.” If I could give her the tether back, maybe she would come back to me.
Stella leaned forward, folding her hands together, her warm blue eyes finding mine. “Sometimes there are emotions so big that even grownups can’t really understand them,” she explained. “Sometimes it takes a village to help remind someone that those big emotions aren’t something to be afraid of, but to be felt and embraced and then let go.”
I would do anything if it meant the light would return to her eyes.
I gave Olivia and Baily one last look before straightening and finding Stella’s eyes.
She nodded and pushed herself to a stand. “Okay, baby, it’s time to say goodbye.”
“But Aunty needs me.”
Stella walked over. “I know, but we can come back soon, maybe when she’s feeling better.”
Baily released a breath and carefully peeled Olivia away from herself, letting her mom pick her up. “Uncle Everett?”
I froze, my eyes finding the kid’s. What had she just called me?
“She needs someone to make her not feel so floaty.” She yawned, leaning into her mom. “Maybe do that.”
Evelyn smiled from behind the couch. “Yeah, Uncle,” shehummed.
I frowned at her before turning back to the kid. “You are the smartest kid in this house,” I offered.
She smiled. “I know.”
Stella laughed lightly as she carried Baily to the door. “I’ll come back any time you need me.”
“Thank you,” Evelyn said, leading her to the door.
Once the door was shut and locked behind her, Evelyn came back in, her smile gone. “She drank two full bottles today.”
Fine, it wouldn’t last forever.
I couldn’t blame her completely for drinking. I couldn’t blame her for trying to erase what happened. There were nights when I thought about drinking myself into a coma just to drown out the sounds of her screaming.
I could still hear them. The screams of her begging me to save her, and the screams from her nightmares. We couldn’t give her the drugs when she drank, which forced her mind to have those nightmares, even if she didn’t remember them. I did, and I hated it.
I finally picked she and the box up and headed for her room.
“Have they gotten any closer to finding him?” Evelyn asked, following after me.
I worked my jaw. “No. If Azrael would just be more forthcoming about the information I know he has, this wouldn’t be a problem.”
“I don’t know, Ev. I feel like we should just let this one go.”
I glanced back over my shoulder, Lucy carrying Merlin on my right. “What the fuck did you just say?” It was an effort to keep my hands from gripping her too tight. To keep my tone soft but I could feel the anger burning within me. What thefuckkind of suggestion was that?
“He never actually got his hands on her. I think we should just…just let Azrael do his thing and focus on her. If she hasthat much anger burning through her mind, then maybe our focus should be training her, pushing her, so that when the dam does break, she’ll be ready to do something about it. We have all of those Initiates going bad, maybe we can take her out on the hunt for one. Let her kill them. Give her a taste of the real healing she needs.”
Revenge. The way she put it, it sounded like all Olivia needed was revenge, but I didn’t think it was just that. I think it was deeper. I think it was a hatred that had been growing in her heart since the moment she realized her mother only wanted her for the cameras.
