‘They never knew about it.’
‘What? So you deceived them too?’ I couldn’t decide whether this made me feel marginally better or whether it meant Jay was a compulsive liar if he could lie to those closest to him so easily. ‘How? How did you do that?’ I was struggling to understand. ‘Surely when you propose to someone, you tell your friends and family?’
‘We had decided to keep it to ourselves until we had chosen a ring but then Louise broke it off with me before we even got that far,’ he explained. ‘I know it sounds crazy but I promise you, nobody knew about it except us.’
‘Well, if Hugo knew then obviously, Louise had told people.’
‘Yes,’ he conceded. ‘She must have told people but I never mentioned a word to any of my friends or family about being engaged. I knew they’d all think we were too young – turns out they were right…’
‘So what did you tell people when you broke up?’
‘When people asked why we had broken up, I just lied and said that neither of us were willing to do a long-distance relationship and everyone bought into it. I got a job in St Francis’s shortly afterwards and then I met you and I know youmight not believe me after everything you’ve found out tonight, but you were the best thing to ever happen to me. I saw what love is really like: it’s not doing drastic things for a fear of losing the other person; it’s safe and secure, relaxed and happy. It made me realise that Louise and I never really loved one another.’
He moved his chair closer to mine and put his arms around me.
I softened in his arms. I knew Jay. I knew this was hurting him, probably even more than it was hurting me. He was a good man. ‘I love you, Jay but you have to promise me that there are no more secrets between us.’
‘I promise you – I swear on Finn’s life, that’s it. You know everything about me.’
I nodded, believing him.
‘I could have punched that big, sneery smile off Hugo’s face earlier,’ Jay said after a beat. ‘He did it on purpose, y’know.’
‘How was he to know that you once dated a girl he knew?’
‘I know that it’s a crazy coincidence but even when he knew I was finding it uncomfortable, he kept on going; he kept turning the screw. He’s a nasty piece of work. That’s the last time I’ll socialise with them.’
‘Come on,’ I coaxed. ‘I know he’s not a nice person but Maya is.’
‘I feel like whenever we’re with them, it rubs off on us and either Finn gets upset or we end up fighting.’
‘I think it’s just been bad luck; we can’t blame them for what happened both times.’
‘I don’t know…’ He shook his head in frustration. ‘Whenever we spend time with them, it always ends in disaster and I don’t like it.’
‘I know…’ I sighed.
‘We don’t fight, we never argue and every time we’re around them, something happens. I respect that Maya is your friend,but I don’t want to be around them any more. I hate the way they argue and bicker with one another in front of us. It’s so awkward and I just want to sink into the floor. And Maya drinks too much.’
‘She just wants to have a good time,’ I said, defending my friend.
‘She drank nearly the whole of those two bottles by herself!’
‘I guess…’ I said, realising that he was right. Maya had drunk an awful lot tonight. I thought about what Julia had said to them about her drinking habits and how upset Maya had been at the time but maybe she had had a point. ‘She does like a drink but she has a lot of stress in her life with the situation with Hugo. I think it’s just a means of escapism for her.’
‘I hate to say this but Maya is wasting her time with him. I don’t know why she doesn’t just cut her losses now and leave him. He’s never going to change. I can’t figure out if she’s just really naïve or she’s smart and she just stays for the money.’
‘Jay!’ I said, shocked.
‘It’s true. How can someone put up with that sort of treatment?’
‘Well, that’s why they’re in counselling. They’re trying to get help.’
‘Have you tried talking to her about it?’
‘We do talk about it but unless she’s ready to make a change, all I can do is listen and support her.’
‘No offence but it’s not a therapist that they need, it’s a bloody miracle worker. I don’t think anyone could help them.’
