“This is very important to me, Keller,” Theo says in a serious tone, probably the most solemn I’ve ever heard him talk. “I’m not sure how much longer I’m going to be around, and I love that my blood will carry on in this country, but you’re also the key to making sure our traditions and values continue. You know them better than anyone.”
I swallow hard, feeling the weight of his request. “I understand.”
“Which means you push back when you need to push back. She might be queen, but you also have a say in this role. Just like Katla has kept me in line, I expect you to do the same with Lilly.” Theo reaches out and presses his hand to my cheek. “You’ve always been a son to me, Keller. Seeing you in this role brings me so much pride. I know you’ll do excellent things, and you’ll honor this country the way it was intended to be honored.”
“Thank you,” I say.
“Now tell me, tell me you promise you’ll carry on these traditions. You won’t let the past haunt you, but instead move forward and create a life of your own with Lilija.”
“I promise,” I say, the weight of that promise resting heavily on my chest.
Theo has given me an incredibly fulfilling life, peerless opportunities I’m forever indebted. Without Theo taking me under his wing, teaching me how to act professionally, understand the royal way of life, I would never be where I am today. So this promise . . . it’s something I’ll never break.
“Good.” He pats my face. “Now, I have to talk about one more thing that’ll be uncomfortable, but it needs to be said.” He once again smooths his hands over his comforter. “I expect you are aware of your other responsibility.”
My brows draw down. “I’m not sure what you might be talking about.”
Theo shifts uncomfortably. “It’ll be your responsibility to make sure Lilly gets pregnant.”
Oh, Jesus.
“We must carry on the legacy, Keller,” Theo adds.
“Uh . . . yes, sir. I don’t believe that’ll be a problem.” Especially after four weeks of not being able to share a bed with her. I’m pretty sure my pent-up frustration will impregnate her on our wedding night.
He nods. “Good.” Then his eyes meet mine, and he holds up three fingers. “At least three children. Being a single child myself, having the weight of this country solely on my shoulders was not easy to handle. I want your kids to be a support system for each other. And I’ll need you to facilitate that support. Teach them about this country, about our value of family. It’s something I didn’t do with my own children, and see what happened?” He sighs and shakes his head. “I wish I could take it all back, those early years.”
“With your children?” I ask.
He nods. “Yes, I wish I could do it differently. I wish I wasn’t so strict. I wish I gave them more love. I wish I paid more attention. Maybe they wouldn’t have all left me.”
“They didn’t leave you,” I say. “All of their situations were so different, mainly based on love. You can’t control who someone falls in love with. That’s something you can’t protect your children from unfortunately.” I push my hand through my hair. “Look at me, for instance. Would I have ever considered to be in the position I’m in? The future Prince of Torskethorpe?” I shake my head. “Never. But here I am, because I found the person I was supposed to be with, and her trajectory in life led us to this position, just like your children were led to different journeys.”
Theo nods slightly. “I appreciate that, Keller.” He grips my shoulder. “You’re a good boy. Your parents would be very proud of the man you’ve become.”
From the mention of my parents, my heart rate picks up. I don’t like talking about them or thinking about them that much either. Their tragic death lives in my nightmares, and any mention of them can switch my brain from resting at night to terror at twilight.
“How do you feel about your parents not knowing Lilly? Being here to welcome her as your bride?”
Leave it to Theo to ask the hard questions without even a second thought about it.
“Uh . . .” I clear my throat. “Fine.”
“Doesn’t seem like you’re fine,” Theo answers. “Actually feels like you’re more tense than the conversation about getting Lilly pregnant.”
“I just don’t like to talk about them, is all.”
“But they’re a part of you.”
“Not anymore,” I answer.
“Now you look at me, son,” Theo says with a commanding voice. “Just because they’re no longer in your present life doesn’t mean you would disregard them. Is that how you’re going to act when I leave this earth one day?”
“No.” I shake my head. “It’s just too painful.” Slowing down, I try to explain to him exactly what I mean. I clasp my hands in front of me and say, “Thinking about the way they passed, stuck in their room, fire blazing around them, smoke seeping into their lungs, it’s too . . .” My throat grows tight. “It’s too hard. It’s all I can think about when they’re brought up. Not the fun memories, not the love, not the moments supposed to mark a childhood.”
“I see.” Theo is silent for a second. “Well, for what it’s worth, I know they’d be proud of you and the man you are today. You might be taking on a different role, but don’t forget where you came from. You’re a product of your parents and should be very proud of that.”
“Thank you,” I say, staring down at the floor in fear that I might grow emotional from this conversation. “Um, if that’s all, I think I should go to bed. Early morning wake-up call.”
