I laugh and then say, “She’s not alone. I talk to her several times a day. I’m sure you know Winnie is hanging out with her a lot, and when Winnie isn’t there, Blakley’s there. She’s very much taken care of. She hasn’t said anything about being alone, and honestly, she’s in very good spirits.”
Pacey’s lips twist as he studies me. “You talk to her several times a day? What kind of talking?”
I hold my hand up. “Nothing like you’re thinking. Just friends. Trust me, I learned my lesson.”
“Okay.” He still eyes me. “Would you want something more?”
I shake my head. “I’m not in that kind of headspace right now. I’m focused entirely on making sure Penny has everything she needs, preparing for what’s to come, and making sure I’m mentally prepared to become a father.”
Gently, Pacey asks, “Have you been speaking with your therapist?”
I nod. “I haven’t told Penny that because I don’t want to freak her out, but yeah, I’ve been speaking with him.”
“Why would it freak her out? There’s nothing wrong with seeing a therapist.”
“I don’t want her to worry that I’ll be an unfit partner in this parenting journey, you know? It’s bad enough I’ll be gone a lot because of hockey. I want her to know she can depend on me. Not wonder if I’ll be a flight risk.”
“You won’t be. Not just because me and the rest of the boys will murder you if you are but also because you’re someone who breaks the cycle. You won’t be like your father. You don’t have that kind of bone in your body.”
I glance down at my plate and push a few eggs to the side. “You mean that? Because when we were in Penny’s office—”
“I know what I said was out of line, and I’m sorry. There’s no excuse for saying something like that. Or for saying half of the shit I’ve said to you. You deserve better, but I’ll be honest when I say, I think you will be there for her, but I don’t necessarily trust you to be there romantically for her.”
I slowly nod. “I agree with you. I don’t trust myself either, and that’s why I’m not going there.”
Pacey lends out his hand, and I take it, giving it a good shake. “I appreciate it, man. And I appreciate you stepping up. A lesser man wouldn’t have done the same thing.”
“Thank you.” I release his hand and say, “She’s actually kind of funny. Really weird at times, but she has a good sense of humor. The more I get to know her, the more I can see us being good friends.”
“She is. She’s also a hellion, an instigator, and stubborn. Very stubborn.”
“Shy and awkward,” I add.
“But very loving and thoughtful.” He lets out a sigh. “She’s a catch, and I just wish things were different for her. I feel like she’s doing this all backward, and I’m worried what her future will be like.”
“Well, I’ll try to make it as easy on her as possible.”
“It’s all I ask.” Pacey claps me on the shoulder and then stands from his chair. “A few more games, man. So close to the playoffs.”
“We got this,” I say as he walks away. I turn back to my plate with a smile on my face.
Didn’t expect that this morning, but fuck, does it feel good.
* * *
Penny:Did you need to get stitches?
Eli:Just five.
Penny:When I saw your helmet fly off, I pulled a blanket over my eyes and cringed.
Eli:I honestly still don’t know how it all happened. All I can remember was fighting for possession of the puck against the boards, an elbow to my head, my helmet is gone, and then, blood is running down my face.
Penny:It was a stick that got you. To the fans, you looked like a badass with the blood.
Eli:What did you think?
Penny:I thought you looked like something from a horror film. Let’s just say you’ve had more attractive moments. That was not one of them. Also, what’s with the thick stubble? Are you growing a beard?
