Irritated, I shove my phone in my pocket, grab my bag, and head up to Penny’s apartment. Just from the outside, I can see that her lights are off. Not sure if she’s tired or just ignoring me, but there’s only one way to find out.
I make my way up the stairs, and when I reach the front door, I unlock it and slowly let myself in, trying not to make too much noise in case she’s asleep.
The apartment is pitch-black, but when I turn on the entryway light, I’m greeted by a pillow and blanket neatly folded on the living room couch.
Hmm, wonder where I’ll be sleeping tonight?
Fucking great. I can’t help recall the words I said to Penny earlier today.
“The way you act on the ice is a direct depiction of who you are as a man.”And then she saw me go apeshit onher friend.
Yeah, I’m fucked.
I set my bag down in the entryway and move to the couch, where I toss the pillow to the end and then unfold the blanket haphazardly. When my “bed” is set up, I head toward the bedroom so I can use the bathroom. That’s when I see a sliver of light under the door.
She’s awake.
Unbuttoning my suit jacket, I make my way to the bedroom door and slowly turn the handle, wincing the entire time and hoping that it isn’t locked. When I realize it’s not, I push open the door only slightly and poke my head in. I see her lying in bed. The nightstand light is on, and she’s reading a book.
I push the door farther open and take a step inside.
“Hey,” I say while removing my jacket.
Her eyes don’t leave her book as she says, “Did you see the blanket and pillow?”
“Yup, got your suggestion loud and clear. Just need to brush my teeth and change, and I’ll be out of your way.” I walk toward the closet and strip down to my briefs which are fresh from my shower. I slip on a pair of shorts and then make my way to the bathroom. I catch her eyes on me for a moment, so I pause and say, “For what it’s worth, he said some stupid shit about you. That’s why I punched him.”
“I don’t care what he said,” she fires back. “Do you really think I want our child seeing that?”
I’m about to enter the bathroom, but I stop and turn toward her. “You realize I play hockey, and that’s what we do. Your brother was part of the fight too.”
“And he knows how unhappy I am. I don’t want this baby coming into the world thinking it’s okay to punch someone whenever they feel like it. How do you think I’d explain that if our son or daughter saw it? Oh, it’s just hockey, no big deal.”
“He was talking about your tits,” I say. “What the hell was I supposed to do?”
“Ignore him,” she shouts at me. “That’s what Gasper does. He’s an instigator. He was trying to get you riled up, he succeeded, and they ended up winning the game because you lost control of your temper.”
“Because of what he said about you. Don’t I get any credit for being valiant?”
“I don’t need a white knight, Eli. I need someone I can depend on.”
“And clearly, just like your brother, you don’t think I can be that person.”
“Not after what I saw tonight. Seriously, you let him get under your skin, and you have a loss and a fat lip to show for it.” She slow claps. “Wow, great job, Eli.”
“Well . . . maybe if you didn’t throw up in my shoe, none of this would have happened,” I counter back because I’m the biggest moron on the face of the earth.
She sits up now. “You’re really going to blame my morning sickness on this? Is that the road you want to take?”
I scrub my hand over my face. “No, that’s not what I want to do. But . . . hell, Penny, he acted like you two have fucked in the past, and I didn’t like the way he was talking about it.”
She stands and closes the space between us so she’s only a few inches from me. She’s wearing a silk shirt that clings to her hardened nipples, and the shorts she’s paired them with match exactly with a lace trim at the hem. And she smells fresh, good, like she just got out of the shower. Combine that all with the fiery spirit igniting through her eyes, and I feel that yearning for her all over again, that burning desire that’s never stopped since my birthday.
“First of all, Remi and I have never done anything like that, ever. Second, it shouldn’t matter if we have because we’re not on that level. You and I are just trying to co-exist with this child. And thirdly, you are not in charge of me, nor are you in charge of defending me. I can hold my own, I don’t need you stepping in.”
“So I should have just let him say shit about you? Is that what you want?”
“I want you to realize that what you did was reckless, and something could have happened to you. And then what do I do? How do I explain that to a child who might be watching you on TV? How do I tell them that kind of behavior is unacceptable, yet Daddy can do it? I can’t.” She pokes me in the chest. “So that means you need to get your shit together.”
