But as she stood to the side and scanned the area, her nerves hit her full force. Lia could be sitting somewhere in this room, and Jo wouldn’t know it was her. It was ridiculous, really. She had built a fantasy on breath, hands, and darkness.
She looked down at her phone still in her hand and quickly called Ada.
“Hey, you.” Ada’s warm voice did very little to help with Jo’s nerves. “Everything okay?”
“No,” Jo whispered as she moved to a quieter corner near the hallway that led to the private rooms. “I’m here. At the club.”
“O-oh. I thought you couldn’t find the portal to check availability? Is Amelia with you?”
“No, she just checked for me. The room is booked, so I had to come here.”
Ada groaned. “Jo?—”
“I had to, Ada.” Her voice cracked. “I can’t explain it. Ineedher. Instead of sitting at home going over everything with Amelia, I could be here instead…losing myself in Lia.”
“But you’re going to sit down with Amelia on Friday.”
“It’s not the same,” Jo snapped. “Lia doesn’t make me question everything. She doesn’t have history with me. She just lets me be. And I can’t stop thinking about her. I’ve tried, Ada. I’ve tried to get them both off my mind, but really, it’s Amelia I have to let go. Lia is just a fantasy, and she’s someone Icanhave. Being with her makes me happy. Why should I stop myself from being happy?”
“I just… I’m worried about you. I don’t like seeing you like this.”
“Lia is the only thing that makes me feel grounded right now. I know that sounds ridiculous, but I have nothing else.”
Ada sighed softly. “It doesn’t sound ridiculous. It sounds like you’re confused and clinging to something that gives you even an ounce of peace.”
Jo leaned back against the wall and closed her eyes. “Exactly.”
“Okay,” Ada said. “Then just promise me you’ll be careful. I don’t want you to lose sight of what really matters.”
Jo frowned. “What do you mean?”
“I think you know.”
Ah. Amelia.
Her face flashed uninvited across Jo’s mind; how stunning she’d looked the last time they were here together, draped in lace and sipping champagne.
Jo shook her head, hoping those thoughts would scatter. She wasn’t here to get Amelia off her mind tonight; she was here to enjoy whatever she could have with Lia. “I’ve got to go. If she’s in that room, I don’t want to miss her.”
“Okay. Call me later, please. Just so I know you’re alright.”
Jo took a breath and calmed her racing thoughts. “I will.”
She ended the call and turned for the corridor leading to the dark room check-in area. Her palms were sweating, her head was filled with so much potential, but she didn’t even know if Lia would be the one greeting her. Still, her gut told her she was in there.
And if Jo was lucky…tonight would be theirs.
Amelia saton the edge of the bed, the low ambient lighting casting only the faintest red hue over the sheets, barelyilluminating her skin. She’d forgone lingerie tonight. Instead, she wore a soft silk robe and nothing underneath, her hair pinned up loosely while her heart beat in that rhythm it often did around Jo. Erratic yet beautiful.
The main door behind the curtain was locked, and it would remain that way until seconds before the light flashed to alert Amelia to Jo’s presence. Until then, she had time to back out. Until then, she could sit here quietly, wondering what on earth she was doing with her life.
Because the moment Jo stepped inside, she would no longer be Amelia, and she hated herself for it. Not because she didn’t want to give Jo what she needed—she did, more than anything—but because every time Jo walked into this room and whispered Lia’s name, Amelia died a little inside. It was one thing to pretend in the beginning, back when it was fun and curious and anonymous. But now, after the dinners and the texts, after the near-kisses and the phone call…it felt more like lying than ever before.
The light above the door flashed twice, the room descended into darkness, and the heavy velvet curtain pulled back slowly. Amelia held her breath as Jo entered, and then she caught the scent of her perfume and almost lost her mind.
“Lia?”
“Hi.” Amelia switched into the tone she’d used whenever Jo was in this room with her. “It’s good to have you here again.” Jo moved through the dark, and Amelia rose to meet her, taking her hand and pulling her in closer. “You’re tense.”
