“How—”
“Soldiers uniforms are often returned bloody. The laundress isn’t . . .” He grimaced. “Let’s just say she’s not a huge fan of the number of times I have brought a bloody uniform to her—that she taught me a while back to clean my own.”
That was when, for the first time, I took in what he was wearing. His soldiers’ coat, which was much more well fitted than mine, was indeed bloody. And not just a little, there were long streaks of red down his back, and one down his front, and it extended to his pants.
I couldn’t help it, my eyes widened. “What happened?” The words were out of my mouth before I could stop them.
“A bloody nose.” He smirked, continuing what was apparently a secret joke between us before pulling off his shirt and jacket and adding them to my bucket. I swallowed. “I’ll finish these and bring them back to your room.”
My mouth dried. How did I tell him that I needed what wasin that bucket now? That they were my underthings? “I—I need those things now, actually.”
Otho frowned, glancing into the bucket. “You don’t have a spare?”
My lips twisted and I fought back tears. My period was making me more emotional than normal, and the panic in my gut wasn’t helping. “Both are in there.”
“Fuck.” He searched around the laundry room, and I swear in that moment, he seemed to deflate. Then, his face lit up as if he suddenly remembered something. “Go see Friar. She can help you.”
For some reason, the way he said Friar’s name made my stomach twist, but I brushed it off, knowing the laundress would be joining us in just moments, and this situation would become even more awkward than it already was.
“Okay,” I whispered, still fighting back tears.
“Down the hall, fourth door to the left,” he instructed, grabbing a wooden pole to stir the water.
I wanted to say something more, to thank him for the kindness he was showing me, for no apparent reason, but the sound of whistling reached my ears.
Someone was coming.
I dipped my chin at Otho, not waiting for his response before I spun and ran from the room, begging the gods I didn’t believe in that the cloths between my legs would hold just a bit longer.
I passed my door on the way to Friar’s, glad to see the guard stationed there was still sleeping. Maybe I would be able to pull this off after all.
I came to her closed door, pausing on the threshold as I remembered a previous time the door had been opened without knocking. Knowing this was going to cost me precious time, I was unwilling to violate someone else’s privacy, so I looked both ways down the hall before raising my fist to the door.
At first, nothing happened, and I heard no movement. Myheartbeat pounded in my ears, and I felt beads of sweat running down my forehead. But then, just as I was about to raise my hand to knock again, the door swung open, revealing a dark interior lit only by a single candle, and Friar, who was gripping a robe closed at her midsection.
“Sorry,” I whispered, biting my lip as I debated how to explain the current situation.
“Come in.” Friar didn’t even wait for my explanation, instead pulling me inside and closing the door behind her. The moment that was done, she moved around the room, lighting more candles. When she was finished, she sank down onto a cot, which looked much the same as my own, that I had failed to notice on my first few visits here. She lived here, in the room where she also worked on patients.
“Otho sent me.” The words were shaky. “I was in the laundry room and . . .”
“Just tell me what you need,” Friar said, her lips pressed into a thin line.
I couldn’t help but feel I had done something wrong, as I had never seen her like this. “Underwear, please.”
Friar’s eyes widened, but she said nothing as she rose and crossed the room to a chest, likely her own, leaning down to pull out a folded pair of underwear. When she turned back toward me, I noticed her eyes were glassy like she was about to cry.
My mind sped up at that moment and I realized what I may have insinuated. As she pressed the cloth into my hands, I tried to explain better. “It’s not because of Otho I need these, it’s because?—”
She shook her head and put a finger to her lips. “I don’t want to know more.”
That made me tilt my head to the side in confusion. People always wanted explanations from me.
“I don’t want any information that I could be tortured for.”
Her explanation made sense, but it didn’t make me feel anybetter, as I realized what she already knew about me. It was suddenly hard to swallow.
I glanced around the room, taking in the various medicines, salves, and plants in every visible corner. “I thought you were here because you wanted to be.”
