My own mother’s voice rings true and loud inside my head, her condescending, vicious tone sending my heart into overdrive.
That baby will be better off without you.
She’s dead and yet she still controls me.
Maybe she is right.
Of course I’m right,she says inside my head, as if standing in the same room as me,I always knew you’d be a whore, Willow. You just couldn’t keep your legs closed.
“Stop it!” I cry out loud, the test dropping to the tiles beneath me as I clutch my head. Panic sets in, making it impossible to breathe. I can’t do this. I can’t do this.
Somewhere else, seeming a million miles away an elevator dings, the sound of it echoing inside my head. But still my mom’s voice speaks directly to me, her cackle telling me she’s feeling triumphant in making me feel this way.
She’s dead. I tell myself. She’s fucking dead.
Then why do I still haunt you?She asks.
“Willow?”
I blink rapidly, trying to clear the wetness from my eyes and even out my breathing but it doesn’t come.
“Willow?” It’s Sebastian’s voice I hear, “Wills, why do you have pregnancy tests?”
I open my mouth to call his name, but no sound comes out.
“Willow?”
A sob snaps out of me, a wet, pained sound that must alert him to where I am because the next thing I know, he’s in front of me, crouched and reaching for my face.
“Red? Red, what is it?”
I can’t fucking breathe.
“Hey,” He soothes, “It’s okay. Baby, look at me.”
I meet his green eyes, so full of warmth and care and latch onto them, using them to bring me out of my head. He keeps the contact, urging me without words to go to him.
“Bast?” His name scratches from my throat.
“I’m here, Wills,” He says gently, moving his hands to my arms and gently starts to lift, bringing me closer, “I’ve got you.”
“I’m so scared,” I whisper into his neck.
“What is it?” He asks, “What happened?”
I form the words but don’t speak them, instead I push away from him and reach for the test on the floor, trying to take in deep breaths but finding I’m not bringing in enough air at all. My heart is pounding so hard I can feel it, can hear it.
He drops his eyes to the test I’m holding in my hand and then he stares at it for a long, long time. I hold on to him to ground myself, use him like he’s the rock tethering me to this place but how long will that last now?
“Is that…” He whispers.
“I’m pregnant, Sebastian.”
Chapter Twenty-Six
Dean is working on running background checks on both Richard and Christian, it’s unlikely we will find anything we don’t already know. If Richard is like us, he would have buried everything so well it’ll be impossible to find it.
I would respect him for it if he wasn’t currently harboring a man I want to see dead.
