“Don’t.” I push him off, my gaze locked on Saylor. “You can’t leave.”
A tear escapes Saylor as he tells me, “I can’t stay.”
“Love me! Love me like I love you!” I demand, stopping my pressure on his chest, sobbing uncontrollably.
“I love you,” Saylor whispers with sad, desperate eyes. “More than anything. For as long as I exist, you will be loved.”
“I don’t want you to exist. I want you to live! Live for me!” I shout, folding my hands and raising them high over him before I slam them down with all the force I can muster, punching him in the chest with all my might.
Shock is written all over Saylor’s face a second before he vanishes. I look just as shocked at the empty air where he was just standing when the heart monitor picks up again on its own.
One beat, long silence, another beat.
Hunter screams something about them having permission and needing to movenowbefore I’m pushed backward. Saylor’s pulse falters again, there’s a faint chill on my neck, and his spirit flickers back to where he was standing moments ago.
No, no, please.
“No!” I cry out, desperation in my voice.
Someone wheels a defibrillator into the room, North pulls me back into his chest, out of the way, and I feel him trembling badly too.
Hunter steps to my side, grabbing my hand while they revive Saylor three more times.
I grip Hunter’s hand harder as I watch Saylor’s lifeless body being rocked by the shocks.
I can’t watch. I just can’t.
I turn to bury my face in North’s chest, his arm coming up to rub my back, the cold of his hand seeping through my still-wet clothes.
There is a gasp from behind me, followed by much steadier beeping from the heart monitor, and I turn again, just in time to hear the doctor announce, “We have him back.”
Relief washes through me, making my knees weak, and North has to slide his arms under mine to keep me upright.
He’s alive, back in his body.
I can keep him.
A sob breaks out of me, followed by a laugh.I feel hysterical. Crazy.For the first time in my life.
“Say,” Hunter whispers beside me.
Will he finally wake up?
And if he does,will he recognize me?
Will his consciousness know all the things I went through with his soul?
The beeping on the heart monitor picks up, and Saylor starts to twitch, his eyes dancing behind his lids.
Come on, Casper, wake up for me.
His eyelids flutter, making North and Hunter suck in breaths, but mine is caught in my throat.
Saylor opens his eyes for the first time in seven years, and his ocean blues zero in on mine, making me feel like my heart just gave out too.
He opens his mouth and whispers in a hushed, barely audible voice, “Boo.”
FORTY-TWO
