“I’m all for this. Maybe some forced time alone will help awaken your burning desires.” Summer sits back in the chair, confident in her statement.
“There are no burning desires. Nate has a lot going on, that’s all this is about. I’m his best friend, this is what I do. I help.” Leaning my elbows on the counter, my mind can’t help but drift to Laura’s comment, and then the Ferris wheel moment.
“You do. You help and you give and you prioritize everyone else all the time. Just sit for five seconds and think of Nate. Is there not the smallest piece of wonder about being more?”
I close my eyes briefly after what Summer says and my memory betrays me as the FaceTime fiasco is the first thing to pop in my mind, causing me to bite my cheek in an attempt to hide a smile.
“What is that look? Are you blushing?” Summer’s hand slams on the counter.
“You are. Why? Why are you blushing?” Abby stands from the chair she was in.
“Did something happen? Something happened!” Summer shouts.
“Oh my God.” I sigh, realizing how unbelievable this story probably sounds so who knows if they actually will trust me on it. “Nothing happened. He was… we were on FaceTime, he just got out of the shower and Hendrix came barreling in like a wild bull…” I pause, and they both gesture for me to keep going. “Hendrix somehow pulled the towel down and the phone kind of landed…” I trail off, hoping they will see where I’m going with this to save me from speaking the words out loud that I saw Nate’s larger than life penis.
“You saw it, didn’t you? God, I feel like a high schooler right now, but I’m so fucking giddy.” Summer bites her bottom lip as she smiles.
“It was an honest mistake. I don’t even know if he knows I saw it.”
“Oh, he knows. He knows and he’s probably perfectly fine that you saw it. He probably even likes that you saw it. Guys are weird like that.” Abby takes a seat and sips on her coffee. “They know what they’re packing… they have no shame when it comes to their body. Ford walks around naked a lot of the time.” Good grief. A visual I didn’t actually need.
“Okay, okay, last thing I’m going to say because I know he’s going through it and I don’t want to make this road trip about anything other than that…”
“I think that ship has sailed, Sum.” I roll my eyes at her.
“It’s okay to have feelings for your best friend, Mia. If you think you can’t because you shouldn’t, then that’s not a real reason.”
“Jesus, you are starting to sound like Laura now.”
“What? When did you talk to Laura?”
A tired sigh flies from my chest. “At the gym the other day. We talked briefly and she made a comment about Nate realizing he has feelings for me and something about her being a placeholder for me.”
Summer and Abby both stare at me with widened eyes and parted lips.
“I always knew it,” Summer whispers to Abby.
“Listen, I’m not saying it’s impossible, okay? I’m just saying it’s incredibly unlikely, and most importantly, this week is not the time to try and find out. Nate’s vulnerable and there are things he wants to work through. I’m there solely to support him in that.” My hands are flailing all about as I talk, hoping to put an end to this conversation.
“Does he know Connor asked you out?”
I shake my head at Abby. “Connor hasn’t technically asked me out, he just asked for my number. And who I date has never been something Nate’s cared about. So if I do go out with Connor, I don’t see him having much to say.”
“I bet you’re wrong,” Abby says as she gets up and grabs her phone as it rings.
“In college, I always kind of kicked myself for not just giving in for one stupid kiss. But thinking about it now, I did the right thing. Nate and I have an incredible friendship and who knows if us kissing back then would have messed it all up? So to set therecord straight, is Nate attractive? Of course. But there are no romantic feelings between us. If you need hard proof, just look at the women he’s dated. Blonde. Big boobs. Tall. Curves. I’m so far out of that description, you might as well put me on my own island.
“I think that’s just it though.” Summer’s remarks are usually laced with sarcasm and innuendos, something I love about her. But right now, she’s being earnest.
I turn my head back to Summer as she drags her final piece of waffle through syrup.
“You’re in a league all on your own in his mind. You are an island. You’re the one person all this time he thought he missed his chance with. All the women he’s dated have been polar opposites of you because he knows they aren’t what he wants in the end. I know this week isn’t about you, I’m not saying you should do anything. I’m just saying, maybe allow yourself to think about it for a change.”
My lips press into a line as I nod my head at what Summer had to say.
“Plus, when’s the last time you had sex anyway? Maybe you should use him as a visual for your own pleasure. There’s nothing wrong with that. If you think he hasn’t pictured you while practicing some self-care, you’re delusional,” Summer shouts the last few words as I’m now walking away into the other room.
I’m internally screaming, but to answer her question, it’s been a really, really long time.
