“It’s fucking precious,” I muttered. “And that’s coming from me. I’m basically allergic to feelings according to your brother.”
That earned a small laugh from her. A win.
“About that,” she said, narrowing her eyes.
I groaned and leaned back in the chair. “In my defense, I’m still new at this whole ‘having girlfriends’thing, and heisyour brother. And we’re talking aboutyouright now, remember?” I tried.
“Nice try. You’re avoiding, I’m deflecting. We’re both disasters.”
“What a pair we make, huh?” I said with a huff, smiling despite myself. She squeezed my hand this time.
“You deserve to be loved, you know. And to love again,” Lucia said, squeezing my hand back.
“I think I know that,” I said quietly, “Logically, Iknowit. But my head and heart feel like they’re still at war.”
She nodded along in agreement, “It’s hard for me to trust myself too...after everything. But with Alexander, I feel…safe. It’s worth it with the right person.”
“That’s a big deal,” I murmured.
She exhaled like she’d been holding it in for weeks. “And Gianna loves him.”
“Of course she does. He’s been showing up for her since day one. I heard about you twolongbefore I met you.”
Lucia bit her lip, but her eyes glinted with something soft. “Okay, back to you. Are you sleeping with my brother?”
I groaned, dropping my face into my hands. “Jesus. You just dive right in, huh?”
“Nic,” she dragged out, tilting her head. “You went from loathing him to acting almost nice. You don’t even snap at him anymore.”
“Idosnap at him!” I argued.
“Not like you used to. I know you.”
I lifted my hands in surrender. “Okay. Fine. He’s still annoying, but yeah…we are.”
Lucia gasped. “Iknewit! Alex and I had a bet going.”
“You did not,” I laughed despite myself, “Who won?”
She grinned. “Me. Obviously. When did it start?”
“The gala,” I admitted, tugging a pillow into my lap like it might shield me.
Lucia whistled. “That wasweeksago. Are you two…dating?”
I froze. The word sounded so heavy. Like a tether I wasn’t sure I could hold.
“Um. No?” It came out as more of a question. “It’s not like that.”
Lucia’s brow lifted. “You haven’t dated anyone since Nathaniel.”
“Exactly. After that shitshow? I swore off anything serious. Relationships aren’t for me. Too messy. Too much pain. I can’t do it again.”
“But thisthingwith Matteo…”
“It’s just fun. We’ve called a truce for vacation. We enjoy ourselves, then we go back to normal.”
Lucia studied me, too perceptive for her own good. “And that’s what you want?”
