“And what about when he saw you?”
I huff out a soft laugh. “It was like he was staring at a ghost. I definitely caught him off guard. I could feel that. And then when it felt like he was putting things together…” A lone tear slips down my cheek. “God, I didn’t want to hurt him all over again. I don’t want to do that to him.”
“But he deserves to know.”
“I know.” I nod, a few more tears sliding down my face, but I swipe them away. “I know.” I shudder, the thought of Harrison processing this truth making me dizzy. “I just don’t know if I’m ready for a confrontation. I could see it in his eyes and I know him. I know how tenacious he is. He’s not just going to let this slide now that he knows I’m here.”
“Then maybe you shouldn’t wait around for him to make the first move,” Antoni suggests gently. “You should meet up with him and tell him everything. Just put it all out there.”
The thought fills me with dread. “What if he hates me? What if he blames me for everything?”
Antoni scoffs, nodding. “Of course he’s going to blame you, Sis. This is sort of all on you. You know that. It was your choice to walk away. We’ve talked about this.” He shakes his head, his eyes filled with empathy. “But also, it’s been ten years. Yeah, he might be angry, sure, but when the dust settles, he’ll understand.” He shrugs. “And if you’re lucky, he’ll see that you did what you thought was best for both of you. Especially for Connor.”
I take a deep breath, trying to steady my racing heart. The idea of facing Harrison again, of having to explain everything, feels like standing at the edge of a cliff, ready to jump into the unknown. “I just…I don’t want to hurt him again. I can’t bear the thought of causing him more pain.”
“Then you’ll have to be open and honest,” he replies. “You’ve both been through too much to dance around the truth now. Connor deserves to know his dad, and Harrison deserves to know he’s a father.”
“What if…” I swallow back the lump of fear in my throat as I pin my gaze to my best friend. “What if he’s seeing someone? What if he has other children? What if he’s in love with someone else?”
Antoni smirks and licks his lips like he’s about to spill all the tea. “Well first of all, we’re not internet sleuths for nothin’ honey. We’ve been around that block so many damn times we could open our own private investigation firm. There’s never been any news about Harrison and another woman…ever.” He shrugs. “So, either he’s so fucking private that he has a family on the other side of the world nobody knows about or he’s dating his fist on a nightly basis and still dreaming of you, Sis.”
A laugh escapes me, my spirits lifting momentarily. “Yeah, you’re right.”
He squeezes my hand again. “Girl, I know I’m right. You’ve probably dated more than Harrison Meers because that man is married to his job.” He leans back in his chair, lifting his Coke and tipping it toward me. “That is until he learned that you’re in town. Trust me. I’m certain seeing you today flipped his world upside down. If you don’t reach out to him first, I guarantee he’ll find a way to be in touch with you again.”
After Connor’sasleep and the house finally goes quiet, I pour a glass of wine I won’t drink and sit on the couch, staring at nothing.
My phone buzzes with a text from Jean probably checking on contract details or the Haynes brothers again, but I can’t bring myself to answer. My thoughts are too loud, too messy.
I replay every second of my encounter with Harrison today on a loop. The way his voice caught when he said my name. The way it felt to touch him when we shook hands, like a spark that hadn’t died after all this time. The way he looked at Connor, like he was seeing his own reflection for the first time.
I drop my head into my hands and groan softly. “What the hell am I gonna do?”
I’ve built my whole life around control. Controlling my career, my choices, my image. I keep my feelings locked away because they’re dangerous, messy, and unpredictable.
But Harrison Meers has always been my exception.
He’s the wildfire that kept me warm for years and then one mistake had me seeing him as the fire I needed to outrun.
And now I’m here. In his city.
Part of me wants to run again. Admit this was a terrible mistake, pack up, disappear, and start over somewhere else.
But another part of me…the reckless, romantic, stupid part…wants to see if there’s any chance in hell that Harrison might forgive me.
I want to tell him everything.
I want him to be part of Connor’s life.
Because for the first time in ten years, I saw how much my son looked like his father. And I saw how much his father still looked at me like I was the only woman in the room.
I close my eyes and whisper to the empty apartment, “He knows.”
And saying it out loud makes it real.
There’s no going back now.
CHAPTER FIVE
