A knock at the door had her turning in surprise. She wasn’t expecting anyone tonight, unless ...
Her stomach fizzed. Marin rushed to the door, and sure enough, Charlotte’s smiling face was on the other side. Marin’s skin flushed hot, and her heart lurched. She opened the door.
Charlotte held up a bottle of white wine and a reusable shopping bag. “I wasn’t sure if you were still up for drinks tonight, so I grabbed a few things that will keep if needed. Your apartment was on the way home from my last showing, so I figured if your light was on, I’d knock, and if you’re not up for company, just say the word and I’m gone.”
Charlotte’s smile was both hopeful and hesitant. Her hair was down, and it tumbled somewhat messily over her shoulders, and ... Marin’s body made the decision for her, stepping back to invite Charlotte inside.
“You sure?” Charlotte asked. “I could drop off the wine and food and go if you’d rather be alone?” Her eyes were questioning. She must wonder why Marin had been so quiet the last few days, and Marin had no good answer to give her.
“I’m sure,” Marin told her as Ember joined them at the door, wagging enthusiastically to see Charlotte there. “You’re one of her favorite people, you know.”
“Well, her mom is one ofmyfavorite people, so ...” Charlotte passed the shopping bag and bottle of wine to Marin, then knelt to pick up the excited puppy. “Who’s a good puppy? That’s right, Ember, you are. You’re thebestpuppy.” She cooed over her while Ember writhed happily in her arms, tail thrashing and tongue trying to reach any part of Charlotte she could kiss.
“Now that she’s up, I better—”
“I’ve already got shoes and a coat on. I’ll take her.” Charlotte reached for Ember’s leash and fastened it before setting her down. “Right, baby girl? Let’s go outside real quick, and then we’ll have some snacks and hear all about your mom’s hot date and visit with her brother.” She turned and led Ember down the walkway.
Now that Charlotte was here, Marin felt foolish for even considering keeping her distance while she tried to get this attraction under control. It just wasn’t an option. Charlotte was too important to her. So Marin did the only reasonable thing. She set the shopping bag on the counter and got out a corkscrew to open the wine.
Charlotte reentered Marin’s apartment determined to get their friendship back on track. She wasn’t sure what had happened this week, why Marin seemed to pull away, but she was going to do everything in herpower to repair things. Maybe Marin had been distant for reasons that had nothing to do with Charlotte. Maybe she’d had more nerve pain than usual.
Or maybe she’d noticed that Charlotte was being weird around her, and this was her reaction. Whatever the case, Charlotte was here, determinednotto be weird, determined to make things right between them. “I brought a charcuterie plate and some cookies along with the wine, in case you haven’t eaten. I haven’t had dinner yet, at any rate. I just finished work for the day.”
Marin gave her a grateful smile as she got out plates and wineglasses. “I haven’t eaten, either, so let’s dig in. Thank you for saving me from my empty pantry, and ...” She hesitated, and something unreadable passed across her expression. “Sorry for disappearing on you this week. I was trying to work through some stuff in my head, and not very successfully, it seems.”
“It’s okay,” Charlotte said, wondering what that meant. She couldn’t separate her feelings about Marin kissing Laura from her feelings about Marin avoiding her, and it all left her head such a mess that she figured it was better to just move on. “Did you get things sorted, at least?”
“Not really.” Marin’s lips twisted to the side as she poured two glasses of wine. “I just ... I didn’t feel the sparks I was hoping to feel with Laura, and it really threw me for a loop. I was having so much fun with her, and I didn’t want it to end, but I realized I had to.” She sighed. “End it, that is.”
Charlotte snapped her mouth shut so she didn’t gape at Marin’s news. “I thought you were really into Laura.”
“I thought so too.” Marin busied herself opening the charcuterie tray. “I guess I wanted to be into her more than I actually was. When she kissed me, I didn’t feel anything.” She looked up at Charlotte, and the expression on her face was heartbreaking. “I’ve already wasted too many years kissing someone I feel nothing for. I know better than anyone that sparks are unlikely to develop later on. If they’re missingfrom the start, well ... that told me everything I needed to know, but it sent me into a bit of a tailspin.”
“I’m so sorry.” Charlotte placed a hand on Marin’s shoulder. She knew how much Marin had been anticipating her first kiss with a woman, how eager she was for every part of this journey. It must have been devastating to have a disappointing first kiss.
But Charlotte had spent the last two days torturing herself as she pictured Marin and Laura passionately locking lips outside the restaurant, and now she felt a completely inappropriate surge of relief to know she’d been imagining it wrong. She internally berated herself for being such a terrible friend.
Charlotte and Marin were quiet as they fixed their plates and sat at the kitchen table. Marin sipped her wine. Once half the glass was gone, she sighed. “It wasn’t much of a kiss, to be honest. Her lips touched mine, but that was about it.”
“Well, we’ve got to make sure your next kiss really knocks your socks off, then.” Charlotte picked up her wineglass, but she wasn’t sure how to read the look on Marin’s face right now. She looked intense but also sad.
“Here’s hoping,” she said finally. She made a little sandwich out of a cracker, prosciutto, and cheese, and popped it in her mouth, then chased it with more wine.
Charlotte was still staring at her mouth. “Have you told Laura?”
“Yes.” Marin stared into her wineglass. “I gave her the dreaded ‘It’s not you, it’s me.’” She rubbed a hand over her face. “Ugh. I hate that it came to this.”
“I do, too, but good for you for ending things before you got any more invested. I always found it harder to break up with someone when we’d been dating longer, even if I felt no chemistry. It seemed like such a waste to have invested that much time and energy on someone only to have it not work out.”
“I guess.” But Marin looked even sadder now.
“When you think about it, the chances of finding love with the first woman you went on a date with were slim.”
That brought a slight smile to Marin’s face. “Statistically improbable.”
“Totally. So, um, any other contenders? Or do we need to browse some new dating profiles tonight?”
Marin’s smile wilted. “I think ... maybe I’ll wait until tomorrow to think about that.”
