“When he told us all about you and Wagner, I asked him if he was sure it was worth it, knowing that, in the end, it might not work out, knowing that even if it did work out he would be taking on quite a lot.” She paused and looked out over the ocean, then back at me. “And he said, ‘Mom, I know.’?”
I smiled and closed my eyes, shaking my head. “That is so sweet—but, June, we don’t have to get ahead of ourselves.”
“I think you know my boy is very strong-willed.”
“Oh, he is that,” I said, thinking of that first day I saw him at the tennis court. I shrugged. “He is special, June. He is so wonderful, and I wanted to talk to you, mom to mom. You want what’s best for your son, and I want what’s best for mine, so I respect that. I—”
She interrupted. “Are you asking for my son’s hand, dear?”
I laughed. “No. Not exactly. I just…” I paused. “I’ve been thinking about all the reasons that our relationship couldn’t work, all the reasons it was wrong. But being apart has mademe realize that, right or not, I only want to be with Andrew.” My eyes filled with tears. “I tried to push it away, and I’ve tried to fight it, but if it’s okay with you, I’d like to at least give it a fair shot. And if it isn’t, no one understands better than I do.”
She smiled sympathetically. “I might not fully understand it, but I would never keep my son from true love.”
“Okay—” I started to say.
But June interrupted me again. “I have to ask you something. And it’s none of my business.” She paused, then waved her hand. “Oh, never mind.”
I laughed. “Well, you have to ask me now!”
She swallowed hard and whispered, “Do you want more children?”
That was much easier than what I had been expecting. “I certainly want more if it works out that way.”
“Like I said, it’s none of my—”
We both turned to look as we heard a girl’s laughter, followed by a, “Mom!”
I could see the car crash before it happened, and there wasn’t anything I could do about it. I couldn’t be mad, because I had pushed him away.
But when he walked onto that deck holding the hand of a beautiful blond girl, who probably wasn’t a minute over twenty-one, it took my breath away.
“Hi,” I said brightly, taking a sip of my wine so that I would have something to do with my hands and mouth. I set down my glass, patted June’s hand, and turned to Andrew and said, “Just catching up with your mom, but I need to be going now.”
“Gray, I…” Andrew looked at me, and then the girl, whose hand he had abruptly dropped.
“Thanks, June. I always love seeing you.”
I bolted through the house and out the front door. I probably should have cried, but I laughed instead. Because the world was as it was supposed to be.
I decided that I wouldn’t cry. I would take some deep breaths instead. I drove slowly, calming myself, realizing that my life wasn’t over. He was a wonderful man, but there would be others. And if there weren’t? Well, then that would be fine too. The past was in the past, and I had to move on. I thought about stopping by Greg’s to see Wagner for a minute, but I decided that a glass of wine might be more appropriate right now. Hell, maybe even a cigarette.
Diana was leaning on the kitchen counter, cup of coffee—decaf, I’m sure—in hand when I tore through the back door. She handed me a cup too. I kissed her on the cheek.
“Gray, I…”
Her face was white. My first thought was the baby. This was Diana’s biggest fear. But nothing could have prepared me for what she said next.
diana: the ends of the earth
I’d always wished that I’d got to go to my momma’s funeral, that I could have thrown a handful of earth on her grave, and then I wouldn’t’ve had any lingering questions. But Iguess there was a good reason I hadn’t gone: she hadn’t had a funeral.
“What’s wrong?” Gray asked, out of breath. “Are you okay?”
Before I could answer, Charles tore in through the back door, into Gray’s kitchen. “Diana, I wasn’t trying to spring her on you.”
“Then what the hell were you trying to do, Charles? Did you think I’d laugh and squeal and hug her neck? She’s dead, Charles,” I screamed. “Dead!”
Gray was white as a sheet. “Who’s dead?”
