“I hope you’re happy,” Caroline said. “You have officially ruined her wedding.”
I had so many ways to defend myself, so many things to say. I wanted to tell them that I had done it for them. I wanted to tell them that I hadn’t meant for any of them to find out this way, that we were going to tell them, that the timing never seemed to be right. But the two stone-cold faces looking back at me made me realize that whatever I said now would be falling on deaf ears.
“Did Dad even know, Mom?” Sloane asked. “Did he have any idea that two of his children were fathered by his wife’s ex-boyfriend?” She crossed her arms.
Well, no, not at first. He hadn’t wanted to know. But now I was glad he had found out eventually, so that I was telling the truth when I said, “Of course your father knew, Sloane. Of course he did. He was a part of every step of this process. In fact, a lot of it was his idea.”
Caroline sighed and rolled her eyes.
“I can’t change it,” I said apologetically. “I wanted to tell you a million times, but you two are mothers. Surely you understand how it never seems like the right time to blow up your children’s world.”
“Sure, Mom,” Sloane said. “But we aren’t children. We’re adults. You should have come to us with this the minute Jack was back in our lives. This was wrong on so many levels.”
I wanted to retort that they sure as hell didn’t act like adults when they were here, when they were back home with me. They relied on me for everything, just like they had as kids. They bickered with one another, they stayed out too late, and I would bet a million bucks none of them had folded a load of laundry in weeks. But I guessed that was really neither here nor there now.
Caroline added, “And now you’ve done it; you’ve blown up our world.”
They both got up from the table and walked out of the room. I sat there, feeling dead inside.
My entire life revolved around my children. I hated fighting with them under any circumstances, but especially now, especially when I knew there was nothing to say, nothing to be done. The only thing that had a chance of healing this wound was the one thing we didn’t have enough of: time.
Emerson was walking down the aisle in three weeks. And I knew that if I didn’t figure out a way to fix this—and fast—I might not be there to see it.
TWENTY
emerson: a cereal box
I’d never been good at facing problems head-on. It was one of my worst qualities; I was nonconfrontational to the extreme. I was kind to people who didn’t deserve it and let some things that were really important to me slip by because I didn’t want to make a scene or cause a fuss.
Some might argue that walking out of a heated discussion like the one we were having was actually more dramatic than staying. But it was my defense mechanism. I couldn’t take the heat, so I got out of the kitchen.
Only, when I walked out of Sloane Emerson, I didn’t know where to go. I thought about going to Mark’s, but I didn’t want to risk running into the Duchess. That gave me an entirely new thing to be irritated about.
I didn’t want to go home, because that was the first place Mom would look for me, and I couldn’t go to Sloane’s, because as much as I could have eaten my nephews up, they weren’t what I needed right now.
So I picked up my pace and walked down to the dock. About the time I got to theMiss Ansley, floating on the water, I heard an out-of-breath voice calling, “Emerson, for God’s sake, slow down.”
It was only when I turned that I realized I was crying. I wasn’t even sure why. Maybe because of the situation, but maybe because I hated fighting with my mom. I couldn’t stand it. She was always my rock, and not having her on my side felt like too big a burden to bear.
I let Kyle catch up to me, climbed into the cockpit of Jack’s boat, and retrieved the hidden key from the bottom drawer in the tackle center. I unlocked the cabin and slipped inside.
“Does he know we’re here?” Kyle whispered, following close behind me.
I shrugged. “No. But he doesn’t care.” I paused. “Well, he wouldn’t care if his daughters, Sloane and Caroline, were on it. But maybe he won’t be thrilled if his mere soon-to-be-stepdaughter is.”
Kyle moved very slowly and sat down on the navy-and-white-striped upholstered bench. “Um. I’m sorry. Could you repeat that, please?”
I raised my eyebrow and shook my head. “We always knew that Caroline and Sloane had a sperm donor.”
“Yeah?” Kyle asked.
“But that sperm donor wasn’t some random test tube.” I took a deep breath before saying, “It was Jack.”
Kyle’s mouth hung open. “I’ll be honest. I thought I knew every deep, dark secret around here. But I didnotsee that one coming.”
“Youdidn’t see it coming?” I asked under my breath. “Imagine how I feel.”
I flopped dramatically beside him, even though there were plenty of other places I could sit. Kyle was a calming influence. I needed calm right now.
