“I think it would be great if you married my brother,” he said.
Lucas blinked rapidly at the subject change. “Uh…”
“You feel like family. You make me feel safe.”
“Oh.” He took a step forward, then a step back, his backside thudding against the counter.
“I said something wrong,” Fallon muttered.
“No. Shit, I—no.” Lucas swallowed heavily, and his fingers began to twitch at his sides. “My family loves me because they’re a bunch of weirdos. But I don’t usually expect that other people will feel safe around me. Most of the time, they tolerate me.But if they’re not uncomfortable about me being blind, they’re uncomfortable about me being autistic. Or both.”
“Did you think I wouldn’t like you?”
“I was hoping that you’d be happy for me and your brother. I was hoping we’d get along. I wanted more, but I didn’t want to be the guy who asked and made you feel, like…obligated to be friendly or whatever. I’m babbling. I’m sorry. I’m shocked.”
Fallon stood up and rocked back and forth for a second. He knew what he wanted, but he didn’t know how it would be received. “Can we hug? Can that be a thing?”
“Shit, yes,” Lucas said quickly. He blushed, but he didn’t take it back. Instead, he opened his arms. “It’s better if you start. If I try, I’ll probably miss.”
Fallon was careful and maybe slightly hesitant when he put his arms around Lucas. He was very tall and very strong, and Fallon didn’t know how it was going to feel. Sometimes when other people touched him, it was bad. It was so, so bad. But sometimes it was good.
And this?
It was good.
He hugged like Frankie, but also different. But it absolutely felt like family. He found himself relaxing hard into Lucas’s arms and resting his cheek against his nearly-brother-in-law’s shoulder.
Lucas rocked them both for a second, an obvious absent gesture, which Fallon loved. “I’m kind of a cuddler, so if we can hug more often, I’d be super cool with it.”
“Me too.”
Lucas let out the smallest sigh. “I think you should talk to Gage about all of this. I’m sorry I couldn’t be more help.”
Fallon laughed a little as he pulled back. “It’s okay. I think that’s the best advice I could get. Thank you.”
Lucas bowed his head. “Anytime.”
Fallon reached out and squeezed his arm. “Yeah?”
“Yes. Anytime. If you want company and your brothers are busy, call me.”
Fallon bit his lip, then said, “Can I call you even if they aren’t busy?”
Lucas’s mouth spread into a big grin. “Yes, please.”
It felt like things were finally settling into place. That terrified the shit out of him, but also, he was happy. And he wasn’t going to let that make him more afraid.
He cooked that night. Sort of.
He’d reheated anyway, which he decided counted. Gage had thrown together a roasted chicken dinner the night before last, and Fallon called Lucas for some tips about how to reheat it without drying it out and making it inedible.
He knew Gage was on his way, so he sent him a text telling him to come right over, and he was just setting everything on the coffee table when the door opened.
Gage looked beat, dark bags under his eyes and a shuffle to his steps, but his face brightened when he saw Fallon. Dropping his bag, he walked over, hitched his arms around his waist, and lifted him slightly as he kissed him slowly and carefully.
“Hello,” Gage murmured after a moment.
Fallon laughed softly and leaned into his boyfriend.Boyfriend. God, that word still gave him a thrill because for the first time, it didn’t feel like it came with some cosmic price he didn’t want to pay. “I made dinner.”
