Me. Jules had said just me, but I didn’t agree with that part. Daddy liked us both.
But even that was all a lie, because it was based on a lie, and you couldn’t build something real when it started out fake, could you?
“I’m going to get you something heartier to eat,” Daddy said firmly, waving down a server and ordering me some fruit and a bowl of porridge to go with my toast. And then, once that had been taken care of, he said, “And you’re going to tell me what’s worrying you. Whenever you’re ready, little lamb.”
He didn’t ask me to tell him, he just said I would. When I was ready. Like he was simply informing me what time tea would be served. It was… comforting.
He was wrong, though. I was ready now, but I couldn’t tell him, so it wouldn’t happen. Even if it would have been wonderful to be able to give Daddy my worries and let him make them all go away.
That had been my favorite thing about all the Daddy stuff Jules had shown me online… although now that I’d had the real thing, I had to say that the business with everyone’s mouths and peckers had been very, very nice, too.
Really nice.
Really, really nice… and we hadn’t even gotten to the bit where Daddy put his cock in my arse yet.
The reminder made mine twitch and swell, a warm buzz waking up all my nether bits and making me wish the brunch was over already so that—
Oh God, no wonder Jules didn’t want to be my boyfriend. How could I be thinking about cocks and arses when I was heartbroken? Not to mention that Diva was performing. She deserved my attention and support, and I was going to stop thinking about sexy times and pining over what I was never going to get anyway, and give it to her.
“She is mesmerizing, isn’t she?” Daddy murmured, putting his arm around me and squeezing me against him. “Maybe I’m a little biased, though, since I can’t seem to take my eyes off either of you beautiful boys.”
I was not going to tear up again just because he had to go and complicate everything by being so nice and understanding and… and just so perfect.
Almost as perfect as Jules.
Or maybe just as perfect, but in different ways?
I still had no idea what either of them had ever seen in me, but the thought of ever being without Jules had terrified me since forever, and now I was starting to feel that same way about Daddy, even though being with him was brand new.
It didn’t matter. I wanted both of them in my life. I wanted both of them to tell me everything was going to be okay and that I didn’t have to worry about anything ever again and keep on making me feel… feel complete, like I had last night.
And sexy, too.
I wanted more of that, if I was going to go and get greedy and list all the things I really wanted. It was probably a little bit selfish and asking for way too much, but I couldn’t turn my feelings off no matter how hard I tried, not for Jules—which I had tried—and not for Daddy, either. I could already tell.
The Mariah song blended seamlessly into the opening notes of Lady Gaga, and Diva spread her legs, planted her platform boots on the edge of the stage, and lifted her arms up to rouse the crowd even more as they all belted out the lyrics.
They loved her.
I loved her.
I didn’t do a very good job of that, though, since love was supposed to lift the other person up. And underneath her practiced performance? I could tell Diva wasn’t feeling it at the moment… and it was probably because I’d gotten so clingy last night.
How many times had I asked Jules to kiss me, even though he’d told me up front that the first one was just to sell it to Daddy Roman. And then I’d… I’d groped him. A lot. While we’d been naked.
My throat tightened up, and I fumbled for my tea cup, sloshing it over the edge, then managed to get it to my mouth and drink half of it in one go.
Too hot.
It didn’t matter, though. It also didn’t help loosen my throat up.
“Okay, it’s time,” Daddy said firmly, taking the cup from my hands and putting it back on the table. “Tell me what you’re thinking about, beautiful. Now.”
It wasn’t a question. And Daddy was giving me a knowing, caring look that made my heart race and actually made me hope for a second that maybe he really could make everything better if I asked him to.
That was impossible, though. Even if I did, which I couldn’t, but if I did, he still had to go back to America after the weekend was over. Jules had said so. This was probably the very last time I’d even get to see him. He wasn’t even really my Daddy, was he? He was just pretending, too. Just here for the kinky weekend before he… he left us.
Left me.
