“Should we just give the money back?” I questioned, worry lathering my face as I stared at my twin. “I don't need the money.”
“Fuck that,” Troian countered. “Alec wanted me to be taken care of once he died. And I wanted to repay you for the hell I put you through. We're not giving shit back.”
“Even if it means you have to keep running?”
“Oh, I don't plan on running. Even if I have to leave, it'll be to settle this score once and for all. The psycho Rhodes need to be dealt with.”
I definitely agreed, but I didn't think Troian was equipped enough to eliminate the threat that was the Rhodes family. But I decided to keep that to myself for now. One thing at a time. First, he needed to contact Madison. Everything else was on hold until then.
All of the sudden, the gravity of my reality felt like it had plummeted around me, sucking all of the air out of the room. Suddenly all I wanted was to be alone, even if I had every support system around me at the moment. I just needed to be alone for a minute to process and let out the pure adrenaline I’d been running on since I’d been kidnapped.
“Do you have Bas’ number?” When Troian gave me a quiet nod, I added, “Can you text them that they can come back up? I’m going to grab a shower and attempt to wash this long ass day off me.”
I was giving off a more aloof attitude than what I wasactually feeling. I didn’t want Troian to feel even more guilty than he already did about what had transpired.
When my twin gave me a small smile and a nod, I mirrored the sentiment as he pulled out his phone. Without another word in fear that I would break if I felt my brother’s stare on me a second longer, I made my way back to my bedroom and the subsequent bathroom that adjoined it. After grabbing a fresh towel from the closet within the mostly white bathroom, I turned the water on and let its sounds flood into the space.
I let the water start warming as I stared at myself in the mirror. Dried blood was still caked into the crevices of my nose, not realizing it unless I looked a little too closely at my features. My eyes drooped like I hadn’t slept in years as opposed to just last night. My clothes were ruffled and were adorned with random blood drops that the floor of the warehouse didn’t manage to catch. I sighed at my reflection. I looked like I’d been through a fucking hell of a night, void of any levity or happiness. It was still hard to believe that just this morning I’d been shopping with Bas.
Yesterday felt so fucking long ago that I just needed for time to reset. Tomorrow was beckoning me and I was hurrying it along in response. Tomorrow would have to be infinitely better. Tomorrow wouldn’t have all this hurt weaved into it and I was desperate to be in such a space, both mentally and physically.
Needing the warmth from the shower, I made haste in peeling the articles of clothing that had clung to me since everything had happened. I turned the shower on and stepped inside before the first sprays of water descended down on me.
Once the warm water started hitting my skin, I closed my eyes and exhaled a breath I hadn’t thought I was harboring. The last bit of breath shook out of me and I started sobbing. Remembering the experience I’d been forced to live through hit me all at once, and it was too fucking much. I toed the line of letting my emotions out but not wanting to be too loud as myloved ones piled back inside the apartment. My chest heaved as the sobs spilled out of my mouth. I could have died today and there was so much of my life that remained unlived.
I allowed myself the luxury of crying for thewhat ifthat hadn’t come to fruition at the warehouse. I was so thankful to be alive, but living through this made me realize that I’d been living so much of my life on autopilot. I was still working at the club and while I still enjoyed what I did and loved dancing, it was never supposed to be my path in life. It was a means to an end, to make as much money as possible. Now that I didn’t have to worry about money nearly as much, it was time to reevaluate my work at Downpour.
A forceful breath exited my body as I finished letting out the sobs that needed release. Now that I’d stared death in the face and lived to tell the tale, I wanted to figure out what the rest of my life looked like. A change was desperately needed and I wanted that to be the next action I tackled. But before I could tackle the next shift in my life, I needed to fucking sleep.
I quickly scrubbed my body clean, going over every inch of my body a minimum of three times before I was convinced that the body wash was accurately doing its job. My skin itched from how hard I’d scrubbed my skin, but I wanted to trick myself into believing that my body hadn’t been through what it had. I wanted the clean slate my survival had given me.
After about twenty minutes, I was satisfied with my mission and stepped out of the shower. I took the towel off the counter and swiftly rubbed my body dry. I glanced back at the mirror, glad that no more caked blood was looking back at me. I looked much better, color returning to my face. I looked more like me, but I recognized that in the handful of months since my brother had come back into my life, I looked different as well. I was a brand new Thayer when that happened and I felt like another brand new Thayer now after my warehouse woes.
It was time to live my new life.
Wrapping the towel around my waist, I stepped back into my bedroom, seeing that someone must have shut my bedroom door. As I walked over to the bed, I could hear the quiet chatter in the living room, glad that I wasn’t fully alone. But looking down at the open invitation of my empty bed, I yearned to crawl into its confines and be swept up in unconsciousness. Earlier, I’d been enthralled by the thought of eating, but now, sleep was quickly replacing it as priority number fucking one.
I grabbed a pair of boxers from my nearby dresser, slipped them on after tossing my towel to the floor, and then practically fell into my bed, pausing only to wrap myself in my familiar sheets and comforter. I was home, I was safe.
And now, I was tired.
Chapter 24
The savory aromaof breakfast lulled me awake. As my body attempted to reboot back to consciousness, I tried to shake the sheer level of sleep I'd managed to achieve. It felt like I'd slept like a rock left unattended. Shaking my head from side to side, I opened my eyes and tried to train them to take in my surroundings.
I remembered showering from the night before and then falling into bed. Memories of the warehouse came back to me, more as a source of recognition than feeling like I was reliving it. It happened, and I was ready to leave it in the past.
Laying next to me was my brother. Troian was sleeping with his mouth open, slightly snoring in a t-shirt and boxers. We hadn't slept in the same bed since we were kids, but he still held the same innocence we had back then. It brought a slight shift to my lips, smiling at his undisturbed form.
My brow furrowed as my head whipped to my closed bedroom door where the smell of breakfast persisted. My bets would have been on Troian making food, but if he was asleep next to me, I felt the urge to investigate which of my houseguests was kind enough to cook food in my apartment. I sliddown the bed so I didn't disturb my brother and made my way to the bedroom door. I turned the doorknob and made my way down the hall from where my bedroom was and emerged into the combined living room and kitchen area.
Surprise was knit into my eyebrows as I saw Qwill standing over the stove, tending to a skillet full of scrambled eggs. I couldn't help but smile. He looked so cute in my kitchen.
He hadn't noticed me yet, so I silently walked up behind him and wrapped my arms around his waist, setting my head on his shoulder. Qwill jumped slightly until he bent to see that it was me. A smile lit up his face as he twisted over to place a quick kiss on my lips.
“Did you sleep well?” He asked me, melting back against my touch as the spatula in his hand twirled into the scrambled eggs.
“I did.” I replied, turning to see the rest of the stove, seeing that he was also making the sausage patties I had completely forgotten were in my freezer. Judging by the amount, he wasn't cooking for himself, or even for just him and I for that matter. “You didn't have to make all this food for everyone.”
