Alex lets out a nervous laugh, and I’m thankful when he changes the subject. “I don’t think you’ve skipped school a day in your life.”
I give a small shrug. “There’s a first time for everything.”
From the way he glances at me, I know this is his roundabout way of fishing for information. He skipped with me, no questions asked. He deserves to know what’s going on.
“It’s like… ever since I’ve been back I’ve felt like I’ve been walking on one of those fun house bridges. The ones that try and throw off your balance, you know? And every time I feel like I’m making it closer to the end, the bridge shifts and I’m trying to keep myself from toppling over.” I trace my finger around the edge of the door handle. “If that makes any sense.”
He’s quiet for a moment. “You told me the other day that you wanted the life you had before everything with your dad happened.”
“Certain things,” I admit, thinking of my list. I’d give anything to have Grams back. Of course, I still want the recoverees gone. “But the more I try and force it, the more distant I feel.”
“Maybe that’s the problem.”
“What?”
“Forcing things to be the way they were before. I know people make mistakes, and I won’t pretend like I’m an expert in what’s going on in your life, but even when people give us second chances it doesn’t mean it’s going to be the same.”
My mind lingers on that word:second chances. Despite me ignoring That Text, he’d easily fallen back into the rhythm of our previous friendship like nothing happened. My non-response must have hurt him, just like ignoring Lin, Whitney, and Raegan had hurt them. But he’d stood up for me in Mrs. Donaldson’s class, and here he was cutting class with me.
My heart flutters. Couldhebe givingmeanother chance?
“So you think someone should embrace a situation they’re put in?”
“Yeah, if it’s good.” Alex glances at me. “I know working with my mom and sister at Rosita’s isn’t glamorous, but it’s going to help us pay for college.”
I study him. He’s never been afraid to be fully himself. Most students I know still complain that their parents are so embarrassing, yet Alex talks about working with his mom and sister in his family’s restaurant so casually. With pride.
That’s when a twinge of guilt strikes me. Because I haven’t been accepting of the recoverees. They’re people who are trying to change for the better, like my dad. And despite my crummy attitude, they’ve been good to me. Even after my outburst about my progress report, Peach still makes my lunch every day. Saylor’s helped me with my homework, and even though Nonnie’s been better at giving me space, she’ll still check up on me from time to time to make sure I’m doing okay. They don’t have to do any of that, but they do.
Alex starts to merge onto the highway.
“Where are we going?”
“On an adventure,” he says, grinning. “You look like you need one.”
TWENTY FIVE
ALEX DRIVES US TO CANTORCreek, a slightly bigger town thirty minutes down the road. Tons of seniors always make a trip here before prom because their mall is bigger than ours, which means there’s a larger dress selection. Even though the dilapidated buildings and charming storefront displays are similar to Cedarville, it feels different. Nobody here knows who we are.
Alex parks the truck on Main Street, which is double the length of the Main Street in Cedarville. It’s a chilly day—a reminder that Halloween will be here before we know it—but I don’t mind. Because even though it’s brisk, the sun is shining and I’m feeling good. Great, even. Better than I have in a while.
We walk past a few beaderies and bookstores before entering a particularly dusty antique shop called Memaw’s Attic. An enormous tub of skeleton keys catches my eye. I pick one up.
“I wonder what doors these unlock.”
Alex reaches for one with an ornate handle. “Remember the time you lost your keys on the class trip to Austin?”
I set the key back in the pile. Eighth graders at Cedarville Middle get to go on a class trip to see the capitol and watch an educational film in the neighboring Imax theater. On the bus ride there, my purse had toppled over and my house keys had made their great escape.
I freaked out after lunch when I was searching for my pack of gum, discovering my keys weren’t there. Whitney came back on the bus with me to help me look. Alex was already inside grabbing his sweatshirt from his seat. I remember he’d asked why we were on our hands and knees and when I told him, he started crawling on the gross, dirty floor with us. Whitney was the one who found them a few seats down from ours. I was so relieved.
I don’t think I ever thanked Alex for helping.
“I almost forgot about that,” I say.
He holds my gaze. “I didn’t.”
Shame trickles down my spine. I’d rejected him in middle school when I ignored his obvious feelings toward me, and I’d moved on to Jay when I knew I didn’t have a chance with Alex at the Sadie Hawkins dance. Yet after all of that, he’s still willing to be my friend.
