JAX - FEEL THE WOLF
Todaysucks,andit’snot even lunchtime yet. The tips of my nails dig into the palms of my fist as I walk up the stairs, walk down the hall, and up the last set of stairs. I need to go for a swim. I need to punch the water. I need to let all of my emotions and stresses out.
This is why you don’t allow yourself to get involved with people, or get close to people. They will only hurt you.
Images of Brady sitting chained in the corner of our office etch themselves permanently into my brain. He looked so bad. Worse than I’ve ever seen him. Nothing more than skin and bones- a fraction of the man he used to be.
His skin is so pale it’s almost translucent and wisps of hair lay scattered across his scalp. The iron chains binding him were meant to protect him, meant to slow Morreux from poisoning him, consuming him, piece by piece. Emmett has been feeding him his blood to help prolong his life, to buy us more time so we can figure a way out of this.
He’s my brother. Not by blood, but a brotherhood forged in battle and in triumph. He’s seen me in my darkest days and at my best.
My clothes fall to the ground and I dive into the pool and sit on the wet pebbled surface, waving my arms back and forth slowly to keep me under water, staring into the blue. I’m not a selkie like Knox, but I can hold my breath for over two minutes. Today, I’m going to push it to three.
Memories of what used-to-be, play on repeat- cutting at me like a thousand razor blades. Brady and I running through fields of battle, fighting for territory and domination, our wolf's paws digging into the surface- dirt and grass flying into the air. The camaraderie, the brotherhood.
Gone.
He’s nothing more than a shell. A better man would let death consume his friend. Take away his suffering.
But I’m not a good man.
I’m a selfish man.
A man determined.
And I know Brady could never forgive me if I let him die the easy way. He’s a fighter and as long as he is fighting, I will fight for him. With him.
My lungs burn with need, so I push off the floor and breach the top, sucking in a big gulp of air.
“You had a few more seconds before I was coming in there after you,” Knox says, sitting on the edge of the pool with his feet dangling in the water. When I don’t speak, he continues, “How was he?”
I swim to the edge of the pool and prop my arms on the edge beside him. “Not good. Not good at all. I don’t know how much longer he has Knox. He’s pale and nothing but skin and bones.”
He pats his hand on my shoulder. “I’m sorry Jax. We have Everlee now. Maybe she can help.”
“I don’t know Knox. Maybe if she was more experienced. She has no control over her powers right now. She’s no more use to us than a child.”
“That’s harsh.”
“I don’t mean it to be,” I sigh, “But it’s the truth.”
“She’s getting stronger every day.”
“I just don’t know if it will be soon enough. He’s dying and I don’t know how much more Emmett can give. He’s already consuming three times his normal amount for Brady and for Everlee.”
“Everlee?”
“He tries to keep himself full, so it minimizes the urges he has. He doesn’t want to kill her.”
“Well, that’s good. I like her Jax. Like really like her.”
“You’re infatuated. It’s something new.”
“No. It feels more than that. She feels like a missing piece.”
He feels the same thing I feel. No matter how hard I try to fight it or deny it, she just seems to fit. Which is just as frustrating. I know Callum feels the same and if I had to guess Emmett, too.
“Well, we’re running out of time.”
