I let out a puff of air. I’d been holding it, as cliche as that sounds, because I didn’t know what he was going to say or ask or think. I was literally holding my breath, as if that would stop time. It doesn’t. It just makes it awkward as fuck when I breathe again. Which is not what I like to be. Awkward AF, as Lizzy would say.
Christ. Why am I thinking about Lizzy?
Because I’ve been around her too goddamn much in this house.
“She’s good. Taking her meds. She goes tomorrow for a follow up with her doctor to make sure everything’s ok.”
“Wonder why she didn’t tell us?”
“She’s not going to call all of her children and tell them she burned herself. Do you call her every time you burn yourself?”
“I’m a professional. I don’t burn myself,” he says, straightening his back and sticking his nose in the air.
“Fuck off.” I shove him hard, and he rolls to his side on the sand.
“What the hell?” He lunges at me, knocking me down, as he falls on top of me.
We freeze and stare at each other for a second before he pushes off. “Sorry.”
We both sit back up. “For what? Getting sand on me?” I brush off my arms and resume my spot in the sand I had prior to him walking out here.
He hesitates a moment. “Yea.”
A silence fills the air again, so much so that I have to look to see if he’s still sitting beside me.
“I miss her,” Emmett says, staring out at the water.
“Ms. Mary?” I always had a problem calling her mom. She was our mom for all intents and purposes, but she wasn’t at the same time. I don’t know if I ever allowed myself to truly let her in because I was scared she’d leave.
Emmett did. He let her in. He’s obviously not as afraid as I am. I could feel myself starting to creep down that dark rabbit hole of emotions and feelings and thoughts that I’ve pushed away and hidden for years. But I have to continue to push them down. Live in the present.
“No,” he moans. “Everlee.”
“You miss her?”
“Yes. Unlike some of us on this beach, we have not had sex with her in a long time.”
“A few days.”
“Which is a long time. Hell, even when she’s on her period, we still have fun.”
“Did you hear about her and Callum?”
“Bits and pieces.” He starts chuckling. “Lizzy has been singing some song about under the water most of the afternoon, so I assume she’s teasing Ev. I’ve noticed she’s been doing that quite a bit and I find it very amusing. But don’t tell Ev that.”
“That you like seeing her in a constant panicked state? Scared to say or do anything that may reveal something to her mom. I mean, her mom has to know something’s up. Right? She probably doesn’t assume that she’s with all of us, but something. Right?”
“Do you want her to knowsomething?”
“Fuck yea I do. I love Everlee and I want her to have it all. Everything she wants. I want to give that to her. I want us to give that to her. If that means her mom,” I shrug, “and her dad have to know, then so be it.”
“Wow. I’ve never heard you… just say you love her like that.”
“Fuck off.” I shove him again, but not as hard. “I do.”
“I know you do. I’ve seen it for a while, even if you haven’t.”
“Are we really that pussy whipped?”
