Enoch’s brows rose high, and his lips parted, before he shook his head. “Okay. So?”
Shame rocked my queasy stomach. I sunk my teeth into my bottom lip, wishing I was anywhere else. He must have seen it on my face, because before I could turn and bolt, Enoch snatched the backpack from hands.
I nearly choked on my saliva as I watched him shake it.
“Don’t!” I shouted, reaching for it, but he stepped out of reach and raised a brow.
“You want this back? Hmm?”
I was panting, unable to catch a breath at the thought of him finding and taking away my solution.
“Please,” I whispered, holding his stare.
“I told you I’d prove to you that the past wouldn’t change my feelings. So, test me. Tell me what’s so bad that you’re sodesperate to leave, but not desperate enough to run out without this backpack.”
I released a shaky breath, flicking my eyes to Jae who had settled onto the sofa to watch. He gestured for me to go on, a smug look on his face. My jaw clenched, my heart hammering, as I realized there would be no going back from this.
I climbed the final step of the stairs, stepping around Enoch into the living room. I eyed the couch and quickly decided against it, instead, pulling out a stool from the kitchen island to position myself across from the couch. Enoch attempted to grab another stool to sit beside me by I shook my head.
He grimaced before walking to the fireplace and leaning against the mantle with a frown.
“So?” Jae pressed. “Let’s hear it. How’d you end up a member of a gang, Shiloh?”
I drew in a deep breath before letting it all out—the secrets that had been eating me alive since I’d known them.
“First, it was just a test. Something to show them they could trust me to follow directions.”
“What kind of test?” Jae asked, his face still a hard mask of hatred.
“I blackmailed a judge. I think.”
I chanced a glance at Enoch who seemed to be studying the coffee table.It was probably for the best that I didn’t catch his eyes. I didn’t want to see the disappointment.
“You think?”
I sighed, fidgeting with the ends of my hair distractedly. “It was either blackmail or a bribe. I was just the messenger.”
Jae waved for me to continue, Enoch still silent, so I carried on.
“The initiation was twofold. They compared it to communion. Said I would bereborninto the family. But I had to give them flesh and blood.”
Jae’s face twisted into a grimace. “So, you got beat up?”
“No,” I shook my head. “If I wasn’t weak and a female, I would have been tortured. But I am. So…instead of seven minutes of torture…” I steeled myself against any emotions threatening to fill my voice, “I had seven men use my body.”
Enoch looked up at me suddenly with a wrecked expression, mouth gaping in shock, and I dropped my eyes to my lap.
Fuck.
I stared at the backpack he’d placed by his feet. Was getting my gun back really worth all this? I could always find another way to do it.
“So, you got fucked into the gang?” Jae scoffed.
A moment of silence passed before his eyes went wide. “Hold up. When was this? Before we met you?”
“No,” I mumbled. “The night we had that first sleepover at Enoch’s.”
Jae scoffed. “You were high, weren’t you?”
