“Okay. Just reach out if you change your mind and want to meet me again before next week.”
I stood up and made my way out of her office, more than ready to be alone. Hell, the way I needed it, the way my whole body felt like it was on fucking fire. I’d already broken my streak, was already a fucking disappointment, so why the hell would I keep trying when I clearly wasn’t going to be able to stop for long.
???
My hand slipped at the sound of a knock on my front door, digging the blade deeper than intended.
“Fuck,” I hissed, watching the blood pool and well over the edges of the split skin. I quickly stood, only stretching the skin more and causing the blood to stream across the other small cuts I’d made and down my thigh. “Shit, shit, shit.”
Another knock had my heart leaping into my throat.Fuck.
I hurriedly bunched some toilet paper against my leg, sopping up the blood streaking down my leg, and hobbled over to my nightstand.
“It’s me, Enoch!”
I let out a rough sigh, staring down at the mess.Fuck! Fuck, fuck, fuck!
I raced back to the bathroom, scrounging for a bandage under the sink and hastily unwrapped it, pressing it to my skin.
I flushed the bloody toilet paper and shoved the razor and open package of disposables underneath my bathroom sink.
My phone began vibrating against the bathroom counter and I grimaced as Enoch’s name flashed across the screen.
I swiped to answer it.
“Hello?”
“Hey, why aren’t you answering the door?”
My stomach flipped. “Um, I’m in the bathroom. I’ll be there in the just a minute.”
There was a beat of silence and sweat pricked my underarms.Why the fuck did I give him the code to the door?
“Oh. Okay.”
I ended the call, sighing with exhaustion and quickly washed my hands. After shoving my legs into a pair of sweats, I finally answered the door.
Enoch shoved up from where he was leaning against the door frame and shot me a grin.
“Hi, baby,” he said, leaning in to press a kiss to my lips.
My body sagged, my brain and heart short-circuiting at the spiral of emotions I’d just gone through.
With his mouth still on mine, he walked us backward into my apartment, shutting the door behind him. His hands weaved into the hair at the base of my skull, and I opened my mouth, letting his tongue explore.
A shiver skated down my spine and my hands were on him, sliding down hard chest, eager to feel him closer. My heart pounded against my chest as I slipped my hands down to the waistband of his jeans.
I’d never done this. Never initiated this level of intimacy.
Enoch’s breath hitched as I fumbled with the button. He abruptly stopped kissing me, one hand grasping both of my wrists and holding them away from his body.
My stomach dropped.What the fuck am I doing? He doesn’t want me like that.
“Baby, you’re shaking.”
My brows knitted with confusion as I studied my hands, noting that they were in fact trembling.
“I’m all for continuing whatever it was you were about to do, but I don’t want you doing something you’re not ready for.”
