“Good girl.”
I clenched my jaw until it hurt but the pain did nothing to wipe out Carlos’s voice running on a loop in my mind.I’m sick. So fucking sick for liking the praise. For that singular moment in time where I didn’t regret what I’d done.
“Tell me something,” I blurted out. Desperate for a distraction. “Anything.”
“Have I ever told you about the time I went zip lining in Alaska?”
I shook my head, trying hard to focus on the way his arm felt tucked against my stomach. The feel of his breath on my neck as he spoke.
“Well, when I was ten, we were stationed in Alaska and there’s this zipline park in the Denali National Forest. My dad and I went, and it was my first time ever zip lining. I washonestly so scared I was sweating my ass off despite it being 60 degrees.”
He let out a sigh.
“I swear it’s the closest thing to flying you’ll ever experience. You climb up into the tree canopies and the views—Shy, the views are just breathtaking. Alaska is the most beautiful place I’ve ever had the privilege of living in. The snowcapped mountains, the varying shades of green trees flying by you. The tundra. The wind whipping through your clothes and hair. The smell of the trees and fresh mountain air. It’s…I can’t even describe it. And I wish I could go again now as an adult.
“I don’t think anything can compare to that experience. And it was almost ten years ago that it happened. I know you’ve asked before my favorite place I lived, and I told you Colorado, but, honestly, Alaska is a close second. The only downside to Alaska was that it’s isolated, and it’s expensive for family to visit.”
I nodded, feeling my limbs start to relax and wincing when I realized I had been digging my nails into Enoch’s arm. I smooth my fingers over the indents I’d left in his forearm.
“It wasn’t uncommon to see moose roaming around the on-base housing area. Those guys are big. And mean. And I’ve got no shame saying they scared the crap out of me. And we even saw a bear once. It was about half a football field away from us, moving towards some wooded area of our housing community. I was at the park, and I just stood there still as a statue. Luckily, it didn’t seem to give a crap about me or the other kids on the playground.”
I smiled to myself trying to picture a younger version of Enoch. It wasn’t too hard considering his family had so many pictures hung around their house. His hair used to be longer, longer than it was now, falling past his ears and almost to his shoulders in the back. I smiled at the image in my mind.Relaxing further into his body as the low rumble of his voice lulled me to sleep.
Twenty-Nine
November 12, Friday
Enoch
My phone vibrated in my pocket, and I closed my locker before pulling it out. I swiped to answer the phone call.
“Hey,” I said, glancing behind me to make sure Shiloh wasn’t within earshot.
“Hey, sorry for the late response. Ruthie is teething and it’s been a rough twenty-four hours,” Sebastian chuckled with a sigh of exhaustion.
“No worries, man,” I said. “I appreciate you getting back to me.”
“Yeah, of course. Um, so there’s nothing that I know of going on this week as far as a family birthday or something. What exactly’s going on?”
“Well, Shiloh was out of school this past week and when she finally came back she was meaner than usual I guess. I mean,Shiloh is known to have a sharp tongue but this was a lot even for her. But what really has me worried is what happened last night. She had a panic attack at my house. Literally scratching the hell out of her arms, hyperventilating until she lost consciousness.”
“Shit,” Sebastian cursed under his breath.
“Yeah,” I said, sucking my teeth. “Uh, and when she came to, she seemed embarrassed more than anything. But I told her she should stay until her eyes came back to normal. She tried to act like nothing happened this morning and I didn’t want to press the issue, but I’m kinda freaking out. I was thinking maybe it was, like, her brother’s birthday or something. I dunno, some event that might have set her off. I know it’s getting close to the holidays…I don’t know…”
I trailed off and rubbed the back of my neck, absently watching students pass me by.
“Sorry this is such an info dump. I feel bad asking you behind her back. I’m just worried and she’s not exactly forthcoming with details about her life.”
“No, no, I’m glad you called. I’m glad she’s got you in her corner. She’s definitely a closed book. I wish I could be of more help, but I honestly don’t anything about her life these days. You would know her better than me.”
I sighed. “Yeah. Alright man. Well, thanks anyways. And I hope Ruthie gives you guys a break this week.”
Sebastian chuckled. “Yeah. Us too. Speak to you soon, Nox.”
I ended the call and glanced up at Jae who was leaning against the lockers beside mine. “Jae?”
“Hm?” He glanced up from his phone. “Oh, what’d he say?”
