I was somixed up on days and nights, I had no clue what time it was when I got into Cruz’s truck at the airport to go straight to practice.I’d slept maybe a couple of hours on the plane, my mind spinning on Millie’s adamant refusal to return to Houston.
I didn’t have a lot of options, not if I wanted to be part of my daughter’s life.No doubt sensing my mood, Cruz drove in silence, but his eyes were suspicious, like he sensed I was on the verge of shattering.
“Millie said she can’t move back to the States.She can’t bring the baby here.”
“She tell you why?”he asked.
I shook my head.“No, and that’s bugging me.”
I recognized her behavior, because I did the same thing when people tried to get me to talk about my parents, yet I wasstillsmarting over it.I’d spent the entire layover in Doha walking around the terminal, replaying our conversation—or lack thereof—in my mind.
“Would bug me, too.”Cruz made a deep sound in his chest.“Hopper fucked the line.”
“Well, there’s that, at least.Surely that means Coach will put me back in my spot.”
“I hope so.You’re better at reading the defense than he is.No one will say it, but his sloppy play cost us the game.”
That made me feel good, but probably meant little.“Well, let’s show Jacksonville what a real offense can produce,” I said.
Cruz grunted, which I took as a yes.I managed an hour-long nap at the arena before I laced up for the pre-skate and warmups.With effort, I shoved my concerns about Millie and my daughter from my mind and focused on the practice.I scored a goal and offered Naese an assist during our scrimmage.
Our team won by two, and the guys were in a festive mood.
“You coming?”Naese asked me after.
“Nah, man, but have fun.”
He shrugged, and I realized that he looked miserable.I wondered if, like me, Naese wasn’t interested in the dating scene anymore.I was a family man now, whether or not Millie was ready to believe it.
“What’s wrong?”Cormac asked, concern etched into his expression.
“Nothing.I’m just tired from forty-plus hours of travel.”
“Right.How’s your woman?”he asked.
“Good.”She was healthy at least.Our relationship was not good, but I was too tired to go there right now.I just needed to fix it.I’d decided to call her at least once every day.I had to show Millie I was invested in her, in our daughter—inusas a family, if she’d believe that.
“And the baby?”Cormac asked.
I smiled.“I got pictures.”
Naese stepped back, possibly weirded out by the black and white sonogram shots, but Cormac, Cruz, and even Maxim oohed over my girl’s tiny features.
“Ida Jane said she hopes the baby has your cheekbones because they’re, and I quote—‘too gorgeous not to pass down.’”Maxim raised an eyebrow, amusement dancing in his eyes while Naese made gagging sounds.
“My kid will be adorable with whatever cheekbones she has,” I said with all the authority I could muster.
“You’re having a girl?”Cormac thumped my shoulder.“Aw, a little girlie Stolly skating around.”
I grinned, prouder in that moment than of any of my hockey accomplishments—even holding the Cup.“Yeah.I’m a girl dad.She’s perfect.”
I touched the image, already missing Millie, frustrated to be so far away and not get to see her belly round with our daughter.I hated missing the first kicks or getting to talk to our baby in Millie’s belly, which was why Alyssa and I would continue developing our plan for me to be as involved as I could be.Video technology would help.
Melancholy settled in, but I forced it down.I knew how to work hard—harder than most other people.I’d win Millie over.I had to.My future with my daughter was at stake.
I grabbed my bag and headed toward the door, catching Coach’s eye on the way out.He gave me a small nod and a “proud of you” as I passed.Something else was in his gaze—something I wasn’t able to place.
A rideshare dropped me at my building, and I headed upstairs, already dialing Millie’s number.I desperately wanted her to answer; I needed to know that her dropping me directly at the airport hadn’t been a more extended goodbye.
