My voice is flat. "Your lip."
He raises an eyebrow. "Yeah?"
"It's... healing."
There is a long pause. "Stop looking at my mouth, Ravioli," he says, taking another sip.
I turn to him.
He is smiling, but there is nothing sweet about it. It is bitter. "Didn't those lips cause enough damage," he adds, eyes locked on mine, "when they touched yours?"
My jaw literally drops.
I turn my head back to the lights. My face is burning.
I take a sip of beer. Then another. And another.
He's right, though. Those lipsdidcause damage.
Not just one kind, either. From every possible angle.
First, there's the obvious one, my father's hand across my face. His disgust.
All because of that kiss. Because of those lips touching mine for a few seconds.
Then there's my brain.
My quiet, boring, organized little brain. I can't stop thinking about it. About how it felt. How easy it was to lean into him.
That kiss took everything I thought I knew about myself and tipped it over.
And then there's the... other damage. The worst kind.
It made me want more. More kisses. More closeness. That kiss created a version of me I don't know how to handle.
A version that doesn't want to go back. A version that's sitting on a rooftop right now wishing the world would disappear and leave just us and this view and this stupid beer.
So yeah.
His lipsdocause damage. He has no idea how much.
"Anyway," he says after a minute, like we're talking about the weather, "you’re a good kisser."
My head snaps a little in his direction.
"I didn't expect it," he goes on, taking another sip. "Thought you'd be stiff and awkward. But you... surprised me."
I immediately look away again, staring at the buildings. In another life, in another version of this night, I'd probably laugh.
Maybe tease him back. Maybe say ‘you weren't bad yourself’ and pretend I'm not dying inside.
But right now? My anxiety is so loud I can't enjoy any of it.
My mind is on my future.
My family. All the possible outcomes where everything falls apart because of that one moment.
I take another sip, then turn back to him.
