“When is your final exam?” I ask leaning against the wall.
“Friday. Then the semester is over, and I have six glorious weeks on break until the next one starts. Of course, Jerrod arrives in town Friday night,” she rushes the end.
“And he’s staying…?” Don’t even say right here.
“At the hotel down the block from the shop.”
“Good. I’ll steer clear of it. In fact, if it’s okay with you, I’d rather he not be here at the house at all.”
“Understood. Well, I should get back to my group call. I’ll see you soon.”
I watch her sashay away into the kitchen, where she takes out the aspirin and downs a couple. Fuck it. I follow her in. “Have a headache?”
“The tension up my neck and back of my head is brutal.”
“Like the ones you used to get in college? You remember the remedy for that, don’t you?” I rub my hands together to warm them up, and I softly, slowly caress the area. My fingers knead her muscles, thumbs pressing on pressure points. I work up and out into her scalp, and repeat the process again.
“Oh, God. I forgot how magical your hands are,” she moans, lolling her head forward.
“I always knew exactly how to get you to relax,” I whisper close to her ear. “How much longer do you have to study?”
“A couple more hours at least. Speaking of… I’d better get back to it.” She steps out of my hold with a sheepish grin. “Thanks for the massage.”
“No problem. I’m always happy to help you, Stella, but you know that.” For added emphasis, I try out that little cherub face Aiden showed me. Not sure it works at my age.
“Mom, I need help with my math homework,” Aiden calls from his room.
“In that case, since you’re happy to help… ” She cocks her head and gestures down the hall.
I chuckle and shrug out of my jacket and scarf and head to his room.
Later, after Aiden goes to sleep, Stella’s still with the study group. I’m exhausted and can’t face another night on the rink couch. I decide I’m staying here; even if I sleep on the living room sofa, I’ll give her space and time. For now, I lay down in bed and wait for her to finish, falling into a light sleep fast, but alert to every noise in the house.
It’s late when I hear her crawl into bed behind me. Everything inside of me, and especially my cock, roars awake, begging me to turn around and take her in my arms. I debate whether I should let her have the bed to herself. But I don’t move; what we have right now feels too fragile.
A few breaths later, she turns tome,her cheek on my back, and an arm and a leg draped over me. Her little spoon wraps around my big spoon, locking me in place, and that’s when I feel certain, somehow, we’ll be okay. We may not get much resolved tonight, but we’re still here, still fighting for each other. I sleep like a baby all night long.
CHAPTER 18
WHERE CONTROL ENDS
STELLA
I glanceat the clock on the dashboard. We’re late for the last hockey class of the season. But if Mom hadn’t suddenly come down with some sort of bug, I wouldn’t have had to scramble to pack up my laptop and get Aiden ready to go.
Part of me is relieved that the hockey classes are done after tonight. Although I got the email from Eli’s assistant this morning about a new round of classes starting in January. I haven’t signed Aiden up yet. With Jerrod flying in tomorrow, and his threats hanging over my head like a guillotine, I want to wait and see what happens.
Also, I can’t think straight until my final exam is over. I take it at nine in the morning, then Jerrod arrives in the afternoon, and Aiden’s birthday in our craft shop is the next day. Sunday is the big party Eli is throwing for all the children. My headache worsens.
Right now, I focus on rushing Aiden into the ice rink. Tonight, I just need to study. That’s it. One thing at a time.
Eli opens the door for us. “Hey, glad you’re here. I’m about to make some announcements,” he greets, warm smile and voice melting me. Last night, I slept better than I have all week—curled into his back. Thankfully, he was gone before I woke up, avoiding further conversation. I’m just not there yet to talk things through and figure things out with him.
“Hi, sorry we’re late.” I breathe, flitting my eyes up at him as I pass by him through the door. My brain can fight it all it wants, but my body wants to hold him more and not let go. Wish I could borrow his strength since I’m running on fumes.
“You made it. That’s all that counts,” he replies. But there’s longing in his eyes that makes my heart ache for him. I know this hasn’t been easy, me asking him to take a step back from us while I figure this situation out with Jerrod, but all I can do is hope that I’m doing the right thing for Aiden’s sake.
“May I have your attention?” Eli addresses the crowd. “Before we head into the rink, you may notice that the coaches and I decorated for Christmas. We have some open skate times throughout the school’s holiday break, so be sure to drop in often. You’ve all been notified of new classes starting up in January, along with the application to apply for assistance with the costs and equipment. And, of course, our Christmas party is on Sunday.”
